So What Was It...

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19 March 2015
23,755
64,856
That brought you into swinging and the whole lifestyle?
Whether you're #OldSkool and been around the whole scene for many a year, or totally new to the whole concept, what drew you in?

Sexual fantasises? Wanting to explore more and enjoy more in life?
Perhaps you came across the idea years ago, but perhaps the time wasn't right, maybe you weren't in the situation to discuss such things with a partner or fear of the unknown and fear of rejection.
Was it by accident and went on from there?
Maybe you'd already swung before and introduced your partner to it..
Go for it! ;) x
 
F

FreshFunkySLB

Luckily managed to find myself sexually about 6 years ago. Soon realised I liked a wilder sex life than many female friends had or admitted to wanting. Had my first threesome and knew straight away I wanted it again and the more I thought the more I wanted to try. Luckily met a man on completely the same wavelength who gave me my start in to it more and here I am. Still wanting, still exploring and still learning about myself constantly xx
 
MP386

MOTM

9 November 2015
28,457
66,013
58
That brought you into swinging and the whole lifestyle?
Whether you're #OldSkool and been around the whole scene for many a year, or totally new to the whole concept, what drew you in?

Sexual fantasises? Wanting to explore more and enjoy more in life?
Perhaps you came across the idea years ago, but perhaps the time wasn't right, maybe you weren't in the situation to discuss such things with a partner or fear of the unknown and fear of rejection.
Was it by accident and went on from there?
Maybe you'd already swung before and introduced your partner to it..
Go for it! ;) x
I’ve probably told the story many times but more by accident it was at not the best time in my life “end of life of a parent “ ... I needed an escape... I stumbled across a site called “Social Swinging “ having tried dating sites without success,having tried “instashag” sites not even a fumble ... I joined hid behind the sofa for a few months before popping my head out over the top in to the firing line .... that was just over 3years ago so you lot must be doing something right to keep me here and interested and wanting more ...xx
Rejection has always been my problem makes me feel unwanted and hideous to the opposite sex .... the good people here have shown me that maybe I’m not so hideous and some may want a bit of me ... xx
 
Last edited:
10 July 2018
1,289
3,775
That brought you into swinging and the whole lifestyle?
Whether you're #OldSkool and been around the whole scene for many a year, or totally new to the whole concept, what drew you in?

Sexual fantasises? Wanting to explore more and enjoy more in life?
Perhaps you came across the idea years ago, but perhaps the time wasn't right, maybe you weren't in the situation to discuss such things with a partner or fear of the unknown and fear of rejection.
Was it by accident and went on from there?
Maybe you'd already swung before and introduced your partner to it..
Go for it! ;) x
I wrote about it in a previous thread, so rather than tell it again here, best I think to point everyone to where I told it last time
 
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26 October 2018
3,739
8,074
70
Not sure if I’ve recounted this on here in public, we will skip the losing virginity thing and go to second part

As a young man i used to earn money doing odd jobs for people and had a customer let’s call her Mrs X now she was what appeared to me at the time a formidable older lady , must have been at least 30 !!!
She often used to stop and chat as I was doing jobs in the garden, and always invited me in for a drink before she paid me.
One day she asked me to sit down and fetched me a drink and I’m sure a couple of blouse buttons had popped open ! She noticed my gaze and said naughty boy and laughed ! I sat sipping my drink as we chatted about other jobs, then she said oh could you help me with something I have to move upstairs I of course agreed !
I followed her upstairs mesmerised by the swing of her floral skirt, we went into a bedroom I noticed the curtains were drawn against the heat of the day so the room was gloomy, she turned and faced me and smiling took my hand and placed it on her breast ! Well I say breast more like battlement bra of the time (1970) anyway that started a fairly torrid summer of Mrs Robinson proportions, but what she was doing was teaching me to Dominate her, though I had no idea of terminology at the time, underneath the armour of her bra, girdle and iron plated knickers was a soft sensual woman starved of sex, I was taught when and where to touch, the mystique of orgasm, the basics of bondage, how to administer punishment, and many more tricks of the trade and went from a gauche young man to the full blooded kinky man I became , that is almost 50 years ago now and what a journey it’s been, thankyou Mrs X
 

Vanezza

Stud Muffin
11 May 2017
11,328
37,226
50
Being a bi sexual woman and still not having more than a fumble behind some bushes with a girl when I was 11, I always wanted more with the same sex but for some reason, it never happened. I then met Neil 5 years ago and he is bi sexual too, we got chatting and talking about what I would like to do about it and that we could join a swinging site and see where it took us. We joined about 3 but they were not great as most of you know yourselves we just ended up with lots of unwanted attention. After a year I decided to forget the idea completely and take a break to re think things. A year later I decided to give it one last try and do another search for a swinging site and stumbled on here so joined up. And me being me I jumped right into the forums on the first day. I still have not found another woman to have fun with yet but us women are fussy so only time and patients will tell what happens there. Our wants have expanded too and we have had some fun times through this site.


Vxxx
 
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26 October 2018
3,739
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70
Being a bi sexual woman and still not having more than a fumble behind some bushes with a girl when I was 11, I always wanted more with the same sex but for some reason, it never happened. I then met Neil 5 years ago and he is bi sexual too, we got chatting and talking about what I would like to do about it and that we could join a swinging site and see where it took us. We joined about 3 but they were not great as most of you know yourselves we just ended up with lots of unwanted attention. After a year I decided to forget the idea completely and take a break to re think things. A year later I decided to give it one last try and do another search for a swinging site and stumbled on here so joined up. And me being me I jumped right into the forums on the first day. I still have not found another woman to have fun with yet but us women are fussy so only time and patients will tell what happens there. Our wants have expanded too and we have had some fun times through this site.


Vxxx
You have truly been fun from day one xx
 
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D

Deleted member 8095

I read an article back in 96, when I worked in the city of London, it spoke about secret underground clubs, where city folk met either at lunch time or after work and engaged in something called swinging ?! I must have read that article 3 or 4 times, I was hooked ! I tried to find a way into "that" world so many times but it was secretive and there was no room for me then, at 18 I had my first 3some, that's when I knew 100% I was different to my mates, I wanted to join in again but nope !! So I met Lou, we got married etc and one night I plucked up the courage to speak of my secret desires, she listened and we explored, then RL got involved and 10yrs later, we were back and here we've stayed ever since, loving the journey and learning everyday xxx (paul)
 
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26 October 2018
3,739
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70
I read an article back in 96, when I worked in the city of London, it spoke about secret underground clubs, where city folk met either at lunch time or after work and engaged in something called swinging ?! I must have read that article 3 or 4 times, I was hooked ! I tried to find a way into "that" world so many times but it was secretive and there was no room for me then, at 18 I had my first 3some, that's when I knew 100% I was different to my mates, I wanted to join in again but nope !! So I met Lou, we got married etc and one night I plucked up the courage to speak of my secret desires, she listened and we explored, then RL got involved and 10yrs later, we were back and here we've stayed ever since, loving the journey and learning everyday xxx (paul)

That’s great Paul and thankyou for sharing good or bad the inter web has certainly made access easier !
 
D

Deleted member 8095

That’s great Paul and thankyou for sharing good or bad the inter web has certainly made access easier !
Indeed, back then the web was in its infancy and swinging was still a very secretive closed society !!
 
D

Deleted member 8095

For me (Lou) paul spoke to me about swinging and i was interested, i wasn't sure to what extent but I've always loved sex so i thought why not. We went to a "party" and i loved it. I didn't realise at the time but i discovered that i am a voyeur, i love watching people have sex. I also discovered that i like being watched too.
10 years on and we've had a little experience with the lifestyle and i have enjoyed immensely :sneaky:
Something i will add is that if it wasn't for this site and the support it offers i do believe that i would never have ventured into this exciting world so thank you ss xx
 
18 April 2018
477
3,896
41
City
Plymouth
When we first met....wow 20 years ago... We were always very sexual and constantly looking for excitement .. However things as always do got a little drab over the years... And as happens with most couples when you done every conceivable position... Used toys... More her than me. . You start to wonder... We had the chats about past experiences ect... It took a couple years for bex to admit she was curious about being with a woman... But being young and oh so nieve I saw it as a threat more than an opportunity ... Well we had our children fell into the routine of life and just lost the buz to experiment and as such the sex began to be less frequent and so much less thrilling .. Me working just under 100 hours a week... And family commitments had basically taken up all our spare time.. And as you can imagine our marrage began to suffer until everything came to a head and we separated .. Not so good as you can imagine .. Well we worked through those issues fairly fast but made a promise to not allow anything to get in the way of us really enjoying life and what life has to offer... It's was at this point we decided to ramp things up in the bed room which brought us round to the idea of experimenting with toys not so much just for her but for me too... Which was brilliant....im not entirely sure how it happened or even when but all the she's all mine mindsets had begun to disappear...we began to play with the idea of her experimenting with her bi side as you can imagine I was over the moon with the idea hehe... After a while and a whole lot of very naughty discussions and talk during sex we decided to look at websites... That when we came across. . The evil site know as **** ...now this site did open our eyes and also give wifey her first taste of another lady .. We also received a massive amount of negative comments more aimed at me... Let's face it I'm not exactly a small bloke...anyways we flirted with the idea of evolving another male but it made me very uncomfortable .. And crazy jealous .. It's taken a while but I'm now at the stage where the jelious part of me has all but gone and we now look at playing with another couple... We've realised at the end of it all we go home together we live and share life together .. And after all we are alive for such a short time . .why not live to the fullest why not get rid of all the labels that surround sexuality and marrage . . Why shouldn't we experiment...try once .... Try twice don't like it .. Don't do it again... Like it go for it..... X
 
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12 January 2016
397
3,271
City
Cambridge
Long story short.... After (quite a few) years of marriage we began to push our bounds a few years ago, and found we really didn't seem to have any. On talking around the wider subject, which we did at great length, we found that we really didn't seem to have any jealousy or posessiveness either so, after agonizing about it for ....several hours on end... we decided to try swinging and joined our first website. We went to our first party the next weekend, felt completely comfortable, joined in with a will, and haven't looked back since.
 
12 February 2019
24
39
City
Manchester
When I was in university I met somebody online who was married and had an open marriage. We had a threesome one time but I always enjoyed my time there with her. I’ve not done anything like it since but would love to!
 
D

Deleted member 11094

It has always been something that came natural to my mind/personality, but I never knew what to call it or what it was. Started as a teenager, I had dreams and daydreams that were a bit alternative. It included women, men, group stuff, threesomes, kinky bits, and more. It wasn't something anyone else spoke about, and it wasn't something out in the open. So I used to draw pictures and write about it. I was okay with being bisexual because I had a lovely mum and sisters who were open minded and accepting, plus great friends. In hindsight that is a key part of my self-acceptance too, I came out at age 13. I had relationships with guys, and then one with a woman. All my relationships were monogamous & vanilla. It was never really an interest from partners to explore beyond the norm. However, in my relationship with a woman, we initiated a threesome with our friend, he was 18 we were 19/20. This happened three separate occasions together, and for me it was great, it just felt natural and free. My partner enjoyed it too, even though she was and is a lesbian, he was the only guy she did stuff with and felt comfortable exploring that part of herself with.

Fast forward to 2015, joined fetlife to explore kink - met some great people who I am still friends with now. Went to workshops, events, meets, and had a fab time. And plan to go to more.
Joined here last summer, and really felt comfortable with the whole atmosphere and open minded people. Still definitely a newbie, really enjoyed the first club experience over the weekend and meeting people. (There are lots of other little details but not going into them on here right now :lol:)
I would be more timid if I explored this lifestyle alone, and maybe would have waited longer to do so too. Which is why @Shadowfox is an important part of this. We met back in 2015 in sociology and psychology course, and clicked with our outlook on life & had a good chat about pansexuality and kink etc. When it comes to trying things out I am comfortable when it is safe and I have trust/good vibes with the situation at hand. I am so comfortable around him that it can make an environment more safe for me to explore (for those who were there Friday you probably already know this from chats and watching etc).
I can't speak for Shadowfox, but I'm sure he has lots to say about his own journey and what he wants to explore and such.

Looking forward to more meets, events, gatherings, and stuff. Was great to listen to others and their own experiences and outlooks,
X
 
26 October 2018
3,739
8,074
70
It has always been something that came natural to my mind/personality, but I never knew what to call it or what it was. Started as a teenager, I had dreams and daydreams that were a bit alternative. It included women, men, group stuff, threesomes, kinky bits, and more. It wasn't something anyone else spoke about, and it wasn't something out in the open. So I used to draw pictures and write about it. I was okay with being bisexual because I had a lovely mum and sisters who were open minded and accepting, plus great friends. In hindsight that is a key part of my self-acceptance too, I came out at age 13. I had relationships with guys, and then one with a woman. All my relationships were monogamous & vanilla. It was never really an interest from partners to explore beyond the norm. However, in my relationship with a woman, we initiated a threesome with our friend, he was 18 we were 19/20. This happened three separate occasions together, and for me it was great, it just felt natural and free. My partner enjoyed it too, even though she was and is a lesbian, he was the only guy she did stuff with and felt comfortable exploring that part of herself with.

Fast forward to 2015, joined fetlife to explore kink - met some great people who I am still friends with now. Went to workshops, events, meets, and had a fab time. And plan to go to more.
Joined here last summer, and really felt comfortable with the whole atmosphere and open minded people. Still definitely a newbie, really enjoyed the first club experience over the weekend and meeting people. (There are lots of other little details but not going into them on here right now :lol:)
I would be more timid if I explored this lifestyle alone, and maybe would have waited longer to do so too. Which is why @Shadowfox is an important part of this. We met back in 2015 in sociology and psychology course, and clicked with our outlook on life & had a good chat about pansexuality and kink etc. When it comes to trying things out I am comfortable when it is safe and I have trust/good vibes with the situation at hand. I am so comfortable around him that it can make an environment more safe for me to explore (for those who were there Friday you probably already know this from chats and watching etc).
I can't speak for Shadowfox, but I'm sure he has lots to say about his own journey and what he wants to explore and such.

Looking forward to more meets, events, gatherings, and stuff. Was great to listen to others and their own experiences and outlooks,
X

Very nice piece of writing paints a very nice picture of our Wolfe’s journey so far x
 
1 September 2018
1,621
6,213
City
Cardiff
We never considered ourselves as swingers, but right from the start of our relationship I have known that Ry is Bi, well more 80% lesbian and 20% straight. After being together for 18 months Ry had a girlfriend as well, ( I have always thought that if she had those desires and I didnt have the necessary bits then she should go elsewhere, only if she was getting from someone else what i shouls have been giving her would it be cheating)
Anyway one night the three of us were together, there was a hot tub in the massive back garden, there was snow on the ground, starry night, wine, then running naked in to the house for a full on threesome in front of a roaring fire. It was truly magical, the most unbelievable first experience.
So fast forward, we married had kids and Ry had a few g/fs over the years and we have had many threesomes, some with long term g/fs some occasional F Buddies and even one foursome involving Ry's g/f at the time and another single female friend of ours ( Now that was a mad night). Then we read an article in Wales online about number 19 club in Cardiff and Ry said Maybe?. Then we read another article in Wales online about this wonderful website called social swinging and we thought , hmmm?
We are now at the stage of wanting to play with another couple to explore more, although Ry is still nervous of that big first step, ANOTHER MAN!!!! dum dum dum. Though after our many previous encounters we both know that jealousy is not an issue and can see that it would be US as a couple enjoying playing with another couple TOGETHER.
All that being said I personally would never turn down a threesome with another girl and the whole male ego thing and boost it gives your confidence to be naked with 2 hot girls. Then having to sit and watch whilst they continue with each other after draining you and discarding you like a used hanky. LOL
 
26 October 2018
3,739
8,074
70
We never considered ourselves as swingers, but right from the start of our relationship I have known that Ry is Bi, well more 80% lesbian and 20% straight. After being together for 18 months Ry had a girlfriend as well, ( I have always thought that if she had those desires and I didnt have the necessary bits then she should go elsewhere, only if she was getting from someone else what i shouls have been giving her would it be cheating)
Anyway one night the three of us were together, there was a hot tub in the massive back garden, there was snow on the ground, starry night, wine, then running naked in to the house for a full on threesome in front of a roaring fire. It was truly magical, the most unbelievable first experience.
So fast forward, we married had kids and Ry had a few g/fs over the years and we have had many threesomes, some with long term g/fs some occasional F Buddies and even one foursome involving Ry's g/f at the time and another single female friend of ours ( Now that was a mad night). Then we read an article in Wales online about number 19 club in Cardiff and Ry said Maybe?. Then we read another article in Wales online about this wonderful website called social swinging and we thought , hmmm?
We are now at the stage of wanting to play with another couple to explore more, although Ry is still nervous of that big first step, ANOTHER MAN!!!! dum dum dum. Though after our many previous encounters we both know that jealousy is not an issue and can see that it would be US as a couple enjoying playing with another couple TOGETHER.
All that being said I personally would never turn down a threesome with another girl and the whole male ego thing and boost it gives your confidence to be naked with 2 hot girls. Then having to sit and watch whilst they continue with each other after draining you and discarding you like a used hanky. LOL

There is only one way to find out how it will work !!