Swinging For Dummies

[SexyNix]

Hi all.
Thought we'd try our hands at starting a thread, so how's this for starters?
When we first delved into the scene about 9 months ago the one thing we kept saying to each other and to other couples was 'wouldn't it be useful if there was a User Manual for swinging'.
With that in mind, what advice or suggestions (serious or otherwise) or other silliness would you contribute?
To get things started, the first piece of wisdom we were told; 'the ladies are always in charge!'.

 

[Admin]

Hi both, welcome again to the site and also good to see you on the forums.

There's plenty of discussions and posts about this very topic and we even have a section in our FAQ about it too;
Swinging Wiki | Social Swinging-A FREE Swinging Site for Swingers

There's also a section "All About Swinging" which is members only area, with many discussions and topics too.

I'm sure many members will of course add to this and yes, the ladies are often the ones in charge

Have fun both!
Admin x

 

[Bump-n-Grind]

Couples are exactly that, couples.
A partnership, equals in the playroom, equals in the decision making. Neither should do something because the other wants to if they're not happy doing it.
Sorry I can't agree with ladies being in charge, you should be equals

 

[Deleted member 3411]

Yes I go along with that I think the first rule is always the most important:- No means NO.
I think another great thing would be advice on do's and don'ts. Only one piece of advice would be don't look up on this as a way of spicing up your love life, saying you need to Spice it up implies that your life has become too boring rather I would say do this to enhance....

 

[Cheeky_Demon]

I have my own set of 'golden rules' that have got me through years of swinging. You will find you make up your own as you go along.

Always...and I do mean ALWAYS.. be honest with each other is the top one.

 

[Alternative-two]

just go with the flow and play to the agreed rules

 

[Bump-n-Grind]

Boundaries & communication is key.
Establish your boundaries before the play, communicate & discuss boundaries with the other parties & stay within those boundaries during play

 

[peakcouple]

We knew nothing about the swinging scene when we started. Rose was apprehensive about her first swinger club visit because she was concerned that the women would be disrespected, if not forced to do things by the men, but afterwards she said how lovely it was to see the women were in charge, and felt a lot better about it all.

Discovering as we went along was fun as well as being an interesting journey. We started by same-room soft-swinging and over a few months moved on to full swaps and tried separate room play. Our only tip is - communicate constantly and be honest. The morning after a swinging session we always discuss what we felt about things, and if we were not in the same room, what we and our playmates did together. It's erotic and usually ends in lovely sex! If it was a home meet we decide whether we want to play with the couple again.

Agree no means no, too. We only play with other couples if both of us are happy about them. Obviously it's different if you're in a large group, then we only play with the individuals we want to.

Think you have to work all this out for yourselves, what suits us may not suit other, so a 'swingers' manual' probably isn't a good idea, you may feel pressurised to do what others do. Just don't do anything you're not comfortable about. Yes, it's good to push your boundaries but only when you're ready. If you do something and don't like it, then don't do it again.

 

[Deleted member 3411]

Yes I think I'll go along with that even more. There are no rules the rules you set are the ones you must stick to. So I guess secknd after no means no is my/our decisions my/our right.

 

[BlancoGoGo]

On a practical level.......when starting out, condoms! Yes, those things that you may not have used for quite a long time......

Practice at home first!

Then practice some more......

 

[Deleted member 3411]

On a practical level.......when starting out, condoms! Yes, those things that you may not have used for quite a long time......

Practice at home first!

Then practice some more......

Get the mrs to practice putting it on for you...or him...great fun

 

[SexyNix]

We knew nothing about the swinging scene when we started. Rose was apprehensive about her first swinger club visit because she was concerned that the women would be disrespected, if not forced to do things by the men, but afterwards she said how lovely it was to see the women were in charge, and felt a lot better about it all.

Discovering as we went along was fun as well as being an interesting journey. We started by same-room soft-swinging and over a few months moved on to full swaps and tried separate room play. Our only tip is - communicate constantly and be honest. The morning after a swinging session we always discuss what we felt about things, and if we were not in the same room, what we and our playmates did together. It's erotic and usually ends in lovely sex! If it was a home meet we decide whether we want to play with the couple again.

Agree no means no, too. We only play with other couples if both of us are happy about them. Obviously it's different if you're in a large group, then we only play with the individuals we want to.

Think you have to work all this out for yourselves, what suits us may not suit other, so a 'swingers' manual' probably isn't a good idea, you may feel pressurised to do what others do. Just don't do anything you're not comfortable about. Yes, it's good to push your boundaries but only when you're ready. If you do something and don't like it, then don't do it again.

Sounds like you've had the same journey we've had, and it's certainly been fun finding o

We knew nothing about the swinging scene when we started. Rose was apprehensive about her first swinger club visit because she was concerned that the women would be disrespected, if not forced to do things by the men, but afterwards she said how lovely it was to see the women were in charge, and felt a lot better about it all.

Discovering as we went along was fun as well as being an interesting journey. We started by same-room soft-swinging and over a few months moved on to full swaps and tried separate room play. Our only tip is - communicate constantly and be honest. The morning after a swinging session we always discuss what we felt about things, and if we were not in the same room, what we and our playmates did together. It's erotic and usually ends in lovely sex! If it was a home meet we decide whether we want to play with the couple again.

Agree no means no, too. We only play with other couples if both of us are happy about them. Obviously it's different if you're in a large group, then we only play with the individuals we want to.

Think you have to work all this out for yourselves, what suits us may not suit other, so a 'swingers' manual' probably isn't a good idea, you may feel pressurised to do what others do. Just don't do anything you're not comfortable about. Yes, it's good to push your boundaries but only when you're ready. If you do something and don't like it, then don't do it again.

Sounds like you've been on the same journey as we have, probably the way most people have done. And it's certainly been a fun and exciting ride!

 

[SexyNix]

Boundaries & communication is key.
Establish your boundaries before the play, communicate & discuss boundaries with the other parties & stay within those boundaries during play

Absolutely, and we did from the very start. Then we met such a nice couple that on the second meeting with them the boundaries just went out the window lol.

 

[peakcouple]

Absolutely, and we did from the very start. Then we met such a nice couple that on the second meeting with them the boundaries just went out the window lol.

That's part of the journey of discovery too, when you're with the right people you suddenly decide to push your boundaries to take in something new.

 

[The_Bibas]

Alcohol helps
Patience is vital
Proof is essential
Lack of inhibition a must
Fun is foremost
Addiction is normal
Disappointment is common.

They are the headings
You can fill in the chapters

Stephen

 

[peakcouple]

Talk about jealousy before you start, but you don't really know how you will react until the first time you watch your other half fucking with someone else. Or if you find out your other half has a higher sex-drive than you. Something nobody else can advise you about, it's very personal. Just keep on talking, always.