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    What to expect on your First Ever Swing Meet with another couple !!

    Discussion in 'Public Forums' started by The-A-Team, 21 May 2015.

    1. The-A-Team

      The-A-Team PV Registered

      SO you’ve done the groundwork, and now decided you want to meet that amazing experienced couple and it’s your VERY first time !!!!

      (These are our own personal views and experiences that have worked very successfully for us !!, M & A xxx )

      You've teased each other lots, and flirted via messages you've both got the same sense of humour, and its flirty enough to leave you wondering and maybe dreaming what if !!, you've looked at each other’s media, laughed. maybe squirmed a little, maybe even exchanged some privately, and now a meet to move forward has been arranged and its crunch time.

      Your nervous, Scared even, "what if they are not what we expected", "what if they don’t like us", "what if the pics were really old, and outdated ???", "What about the sex, When, how ??, What if I can’t", "What if I don’t want you to have sex with them when we get there ??", "What if We really do ??",

      These are all some of the normal reactions to a very stressful situation that you as a couple have both been working up to for a long time, you've talked till your blue in the face, and sometimes sulked at the answers but still been excited inside, at the very thought of sleeping with and sharing new sexual experiences with another person and hopefully with your partners TOTAL FULL permission, !!!!.

      1) For this to work you must have absolute full trust and have no questions about that in your mind at all. If you have any doubts at all with your partner for whatever reason, DO NOT GO AHEAD WITH THIS. ( Swinnging will never fix a failing relationship !!)

      2) Go to your first meet with a total open mind, and go to make friends with them first, don’t worry about the sex or anything else at this early stage, if and when your friendship is confirmed and you become friendly and comfortable in each other’s company the rest is all relatively easy.

      3) If you don’t get on, for whatever reason, maybe a personality clash, or photos were 15 years out of date, or worse, body odour, (Yes it happens !!), simply explain that this is not for you and whilst your happy to be friends socially, that’s all you will ever be. This is honestly a totally expected scenario at a first meet, Not all of them work out successfully, and do NOT feel embarrassed to state your feelings clearly, (And you DO NOT have to explain yourself), it is an accepted and recognised fact within Swinging, that No is a final word and it is normally accepted without question or argument when used, so USE IT, without feeling guilty, better now than, later when things may get more intimate!!!.

      4) And when you do get on well, and you probably will, (after all, you have been chatting and flirting for ages), and your all there for the exact same reason, FUN!!! so things will, and should flow and develop quite quickly, upon this point, as a new couple and on your first ever social meet, I would recommend arranging a second meet quite quickly where it’s possible, and also a suitable venue agreed by all of you to have fun together in a relaxed and comfortable environment. Be that a hotel, or one or the others house, but as a tip have a couple of drinks together again beforehand this will help to re break any nerves that may possibly have developed again.

      (Once your joint confidence has built up a lot more, same night scenarios can be thought about)


      5) As a couple, you are and will be, to all intense and purposes, committing adultery or cheating on each other at some point on this meet. This is the breaking point for so many couples, and also afterwards when the realisation has set in as to what’s happened. My advice on this is to give each other full and open permission to be single for the duration of the meeting. No questions, No recriminations, and remember the same rules apply to and for the both of you. Make sure you are totally aware of your own safe sex rulings, and dos and don’ts sexually, that you are happy to comply with whilst with your new partners for the evening.

      And STICK RIGIDLY TO YOUR OWN RULES,

      Any swinging couple will always adhere and play within each other’s boundaries, and again this is a normality, and a totally accepted practice, so don’t feel under any pressure to do anything you are not totally comfortable with, and don’t forget NO is the key word to force a Full stop on events. Some couples sometimes adopt a code word between the two of them, to say, if they feel things are out of control, and need their partner to step in,

      6) Above all try to relax totally, and enjoy this new sexual experience, treat this as a first new sexual experience with a new partner, and let the past experiences of that new partner relax you and help you feel at ease, Spoil you, and even you spoil them back if your comfortable to do so, this is a very new, and hopefully exciting, and hopefully very enjoyable experience for you both, try to forget about your partner in the background, and concentrate on your new one and the new feelings you are receiving, yes initially it will be strange, when you undress, when you first touch, but trust me this will disappear rapidly under the experience of the couple you have gone to meet, and honestly, very quickly gets a lot easier as your self confidence in this new lifestyle develops.

      7) At the end of your fun encounter with these new lovers, you must immediately when alone, reaffirm your love for each other and ASAP,you must bring each other back to been the loving trusting couple you were before the evening commenced.

      This does two things


      A) Re-affirms to your partner that you love them totally, and above all others,

      B) Allows each other to re-feel your own true sexual love again, along with trust and intimacy again, and with you, and YOU ONLY. This is absolutely essential to the success or failure of any future meets, as each partner then knows fully, and confidently, that they are free to relax and let themselves go sexually when playing, but yet, still in the very safe knowledge that you will be waiting for them afterwards at the end of your fun, to receive them back into your very close loving relationship.

      8) Your new fun with couples/singles/ groups is just that it’s FUN, it’s not love, it’s not commitment, it’s definitely not meaningful, Yes it may be intense, and Yes it may be passionate, possibly even mind blowing, but its only fun, and it is the New experiences, that you get from meeting your new partners.

      LOVE IS WHAT YOU HAVE ONLY FOR YOUR REAL PARTNER


      Keep the two emotions miles apart and you should be a very successful swinger without any issues or confidence problems.


      Happy Swinging, and have FUN !!!!


      Mark and Andrea xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
       
      • Like Like x 4
      • Admin

        Admin Site Owner Admin

        This is a fantastic thread and perfect - for newcomers to the scene/lifestyle (y)
        Even more so as it has been written and constructed by good members of our site who want to welcome newbies to the lifestyle, as much as we do- and with a good guide from their first hand experience point of view.

        Thank you @Mark & Andrea for writing such a well constructed and advisory thread. xxx

        This site, is for swinging and the lifestyle. Not a quick pick up a f*ck site.
        The thread/guide they have written above, is an epitome of the swinging ethos for first-timers dipping their toes.
         
        • Like Like x 2
        • forest_pete

          forest_pete PV Registered

          I agree if you just want a quick shag go else where this is about making friends first above the sex, well for me anyway
           
          • Like Like x 1
          • Lace

            Lace PV Registered

            Very interesting Andrea and great thread..When I wake up I shall get stuck in lol..Coffee calling xx
             
          • Lace

            Lace PV Registered

            Ok I love this and it is an amazing thread for all the guys new to swinging and there are quite a few here that I have spoken too that dont qutite understand it all..
            You are right on every point Andrea and emphasised that its not about a quick f... and thats it..
            Building a friendship and flirting to get to know each other is the main key to swinging,If it isnt then go into town and get the one night stand that you are after...
            With me there has to be chemistry and passion to a certain level and respect from both sides,most of all the connection with your own partner can never be switched off and the love you have,
            No boundary should be stepped over and like you say no means no and if we did meet someone we were attracted to then i hope when the time comes there would be no body odour as we are clean and expect the same from anyone else but in past experience I have been very lucky hehe....xxxx
             
            • Like Like x 1
            • forest_pete

              forest_pete PV Registered

              For someone to have a wash is common sense lol xx
               
              • Like Like x 3
              • Lace

                Lace PV Registered

                True for normal people but think there are a few that dont and have heard some horror stories hehe xx
                 
                • Like Like x 1
                • forest_pete

                  forest_pete PV Registered

                  Well if you smell says all about you as a person. Xx
                   
                  • Like Like x 3
                  • Lace

                    Lace PV Registered

                    Very true lmao xx
                     
                    • Like Like x 1
                    • forest_pete

                      forest_pete PV Registered

                      Sorry in a very direct mood today pmsl xx
                       
                      • Like Like x 1
                      • The-A-Team

                        The-A-Team PV Registered

                        We would completely 100% agree, but it has happened, and more than once !!! A xx
                         
                        • Like Like x 2
                        • forest_pete

                          forest_pete PV Registered

                          That's horrible!!!
                           
                          • Like Like x 3
                          • Lace

                            Lace PV Registered

                            Looks like xx
                             
                            • Like Like x 1
                            • Lace

                              Lace PV Registered

                              Not good xx
                               
                              • Like Like x 1
                              • forest_pete

                                forest_pete PV Registered

                                I will be nicer lol xx
                                 
                              • Lace

                                Lace PV Registered

                                Glad to hear it hehe xx
                                 
                              • Lace

                                Lace PV Registered

                                So bad experience with an odour problem has anyone had the pleasure (y):confused:o_O
                                 
                              • The-A-Team

                                The-A-Team PV Registered

                                you would presume as "Swingers" that sensible cleanliness was a must, but Smell hits the imagination and tells you if B.O. is already hinting, whilst dressed, Naked is a run a mile scenario !!!
                                 
                                • Like Like x 2
                                • Lace

                                  Lace PV Registered

                                  Omg you make me laugh if a hint then wouldnt get the chance haha xxx
                                   
                                • forest_pete

                                  forest_pete PV Registered

                                  One work

                                  Lynx
                                   
                                  • Like Like x 1
                                  • The-A-Team

                                    The-A-Team PV Registered

                                    I've noticed it whilst and during fun , develop due to not enough deodorant but to be fair, the I make my guys work hard lol xxx A xx
                                     
                                  • Lace

                                    Lace PV Registered

                                    Lynx is good but Im more of a coco channel girl but if feeling dark it has to be Paloma Piccasso xx
                                     
                                    • Like Like x 1
                                    • The-A-Team

                                      The-A-Team PV Registered

                                      Hmmmm sensual !! M x
                                       
                                      • Like Like x 1
                                      • Lace

                                        Lace PV Registered

                                        Very and I do like a good sniff of someone with good perfume xx
                                         
                                        • Like Like x 1
                                        • The-A-Team

                                          The-A-Team PV Registered

                                          With us commuting through duty frees so often, we are lucky that we've managed to try quite a few before settling on that smell that really works for us, (hopefully 1day you can voice your approval as to its effectiveness ) xxx
                                           
                                          • Like Like x 2

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