Debs thought it would be a good idea to wax my nutsack once. I ended up in hospital for a week.
I must have been having an off day to let let her do it. I can't remember why I did it now but she must've bribed me with some sort of debauchery. The next day one bollock was really aching. We'd arranged to go to a friends house that night for an MMF and I decided not to spoil the meet and to soldier on. During an enthusiastic spit-roast I pulled out to come over Debs arse and there was blood in it!. Stuart and Debs, being sympathetic sorts, just carried on playing! Whenever I got hard it was excruciating and watching you mate rogering your girlfriend (as she was then) probably wasn't the best course of treatment. Anyway the next day it was off to the quack, he had a rummage about and sent me to the hospital for a scan. At the hospital I went for a pee, only to pass some rather large blood clots. I told the urologist about the blood in my semen and the clots when I urinated (why do we use posh words when talking to doctors, I'm sure they know what 'come' and 'peeing' are?) I also told him about the waxing and he arranged a scan.
The first words he said when he came back with the results where "Well it's good news, one of your testicles had been twisted cutting off the blood supply but when your GP examined you he must've partially untwisted it and restored the blood flow. We won't have to whip it off"
WTF? Nobody had mentioned losing a bollock.
The bad news is that we have to keep you in for a while until everything returns to normal.
It was six days before I went home
I've stuck to shaving ever since