Single Guys On The Swinging Scene

[MP386]

Having been here for quite a while now and being a single guy I just wondered what others experiences have been ... I have met 3 lovely couples in my time here and I did attend one night of the SS birthday party ...
Here's the but !!
Sometimes I feel as if single guys are tolerated rather than totally accepted from what i can see the up coming socials are aimed solely at couples and single women being Saturdays ... yes there is the question of club rules which in the whole exclude single guys on a Saturday..... Fridays are usually a no go for me due to work commitments ...now I expect a flurry of "find yourself a plus one !! " easier said than done ... Before anyone says it I have asked without success ...
i regularly ask myself the question.... "should i stay or should I go " SS has become a party of my daily routine... morning noon and night ...could I leave I don't know ... it would be a hard decision ...
I am not the most confident contacting people sure lots of you know that ... never know what to say really..can't remember a couple or single lady contacting first it may well have happened but at my age the memory is not what it was ... so do single guys get contacted ??
I feel every one assumes it's easy being single , plenty of time ,plenty of money not always easy from my point of view I have real life stuff that means some planning has to be involved just can drop everything at a moments notice ...
if you have got this far you have done well thanks....

 

[Deleted member 1030]

Sometimes I feel as if single guys are tolerated rather than totally accepted

Sorry, I totally disagree with this. That is not an attitude I've ever seen on here. If it did surface, we would stamp on it. Socials are simply down to club rules, not any decisions by this site.

 

[Terryg]

Yes Club Rules are restrictive to Single Guys and I can guess the reason why.

Have I ever been contacted, yes, once but due to a case of misidentification. So no it's not easy.

I shall continue to keep an open mind!

 

[MP386]

Sorry, I totally disagree with this. That is not an attitude I've ever seen on here. If it did surface, we would stamp on it. Socials are simply down to club rules, not any decisions by this site.

It's fine to disagree yes as I stated club rules are what they are ...as for attitude and stamping on it ?? Don't understand that thought open discussion was ok ...

 

[Deleted member 1030]

Don't understand that thought open discussion was ok ...

Of course it is. That's not what I meant. I meant that if we saw anybody treating single guys badly, we would deal with it

 

[MP386]

Sorry, I totally disagree with this. That is not an attitude I've ever seen on here. If it did surface, we would stamp on it. Socials are simply down to club rules, not any decisions by this site.

Oh and that was a generalisation of swinging as a whole no reflection on the site ....

 

[Admin]

Of course it is. That's not what I meant. I meant that if we saw anybody treating single guys badly, we would deal with it

I've removed my post as @meandlis has clarified.

 

[Deleted member 1030]

Oh and that was a generalisation of swinging as a whole no reflection on the site ....

Then you may be right... that's one of the reasons we like to look after our genuine single guys here

 

[Miss-Sexy-Legs]

Oh and that was a generalisation of swinging as a whole no reflection on the site ....

Awe cmere ya big lug I'll take care of you squidgy bum

 

[Therapon]

There is no simple answer to this, it's down to the members on the site who they want to interact with. As you say you have met a few couples but others may only wish to meet other couples. That is their decision and not something we as staff have any say in. I joined as a single guy and accepted the fact that many were not looking for a SG, I attended the first social as a SG but had to abide by club rules like anyone else. The fact that people did not contact you first is again something that is down to what others are looking for, if you happen to fit their "needs" then I'm sure they will contact you when they are ready. I might have come across as a little harsh but I believe what I have posted is the stark reality. All you can do is remain active, as you are, and hope that the right person eventually joins the site. I've been through all the same things/thoughts as yourself except in my case that person found me. Stick around, what have you got to loose.

 

[Admin]

I have been taunted abused deceived and insulted just for being for want of a better phrase being a "married and playing solo" there is as I've always said a very justified reason for that and if you don't believe that please feel free to ask @Sammy she is totally aware of my situation and always has been.

Almost got me there ya bugger.

 

[Deleted member 3657]

On the whole I've found it very welcoming. I do honestly believe some tolerate us single guys here, others set their preferences to block single guys without even making any effort to interact. However, the majority do include us and I have been contacted by others first, both couples and single ladies.

I have asked myself the same question lately. Answer is still pending.

 

[Terryg]

On the whole I've found it very welcoming. I do honestly believe some tolerate us single guys here, others set their preferences to block single guys without even making any effort to interact. However, the majority do include us and I have been contacted by others first, both couples and single ladies.

I have asked myself the same question lately. Answer is still pending.

Yes the blocking when you've not even contacted someone can be a bit disconcerting! Nowt so strange as folk!

 

[Miss-Sexy-Legs]

Ok lets put all this into perspective shall we .
1 yes single gents may feel tolerated by some not the majority might I add on here
2 clubs have set rules they are what they are
3 single females have the same problem believe it or not ,
4 couples have a preference its their choice same as everyone else
5 on a different site I as a s f felt battered by s g and couples bombarding me with unwanted pms practically demanding meets .
People may feel dubious about meeting others whether its a s g ,a s f or another couple this is the way the life style we lead is and probably always will be ,we need to accept this as given no matter what sex we are

 

[Deleted member 1030]

Yes the blocking when you've not even contacted someone can be a bit disconcerting! Nowt so strange as folk!

Yes, but as I've said before, people's privacy is their own concern. That person might have very good reason for their chosen settings

 

[Phoenixcouplexx]

We're happy to chat with anyone. Sure single guys are not on our radar because we're not looking to meet them but we're still willing to chat when we are out at social and in the clubs etc.
I haven't witnessed single guys being 'tolerated' on here, generally I've seen them being treated just like everyone else I think.
You know if you want to be excepted within the scene then by far the best thing to do is get out on the scene. There's very few official SS events they're mostly informal ones. So why not grab one of the other lads, maybe a couple or two that are looking to meet single guys and arrange one of your own? That gets your name straight to the top of the list with the people that go. To be successful you simply have to get our there and be noticed for the right reasons.

 

[Terryg]

Yes the blocking when you've not even contacted someone can be a bit disconcerting! Nowt so strange as folk!

Yes the blocking when you've not even contacted someone can be a bit disconcerting! Nowt so strange as folk!

Sorry the levity was unnecessary, but all me.
The disconcerting bit comes from generally thinking "what have I done"? rather than thinking of people's personal settings! New perspective now, thank you.

 

[MP386]

We're happy to chat with anyone. Sure single guys are not on our radar because we're not looking to meet them but we're still willing to chat when we are out at social and in the clubs etc.
I haven't witnessed single guys being 'tolerated' on here, generally I've seen them being treated just like everyone else I think.
You know if you want to be excepted within the scene then by far the best thing to do is get out on the scene. There's very few official SS events they're mostly informal ones. So why not grab one of the other lads, maybe a couple or two that are looking to meet single guys and arrange one of your own? That gets your name straight to the top of the list with the people that go. To be successful you simply have to get our there and be noticed for the right reasons.

The tolerated was a generalisation nothing to do with SS... I have been here a long time everyday pretty much for more than a year a member for longer than that ... I accept everyone has preferences I do read profiles ..,
As for getting out there or grabbing a few guys .... again my point of Saturday exclusions from clubs ..

 

[Deleted member 1030]

again my point of Saturday exclusions from clubs ..

True, but if you were looking at organising a social, there are clubs out there with different policies.

 

[Phoenixcouplexx]

True, but if you were looking at organising a social, there are clubs out there with different policies.

This and why does it have to be a club? The more people that know you the more likely you are to be successful online to. Maybe arrange a social with as many people there as you can arrange, even make it a semi regular, area thing and then because people have met you face to face they are more likely to agree a private meet further down the line incliding online and you'll find yourself getting invited to house parties too. A good friend of ours did this and became known for all the right reasons and some Ightfield would end up escorting 3 or 4 ladies out at the same time.

 

[MP386]

True, but if you were looking at organising a social, there are clubs out there with different policies.

Not something I have thought about ... probably wouldn't happen but there seems to be a couple of clubs that are the favourites here ... VA ... Charms .... both with exclusion policies....

 

[Never_say_Never]

Having been here for quite a while now and being a single guy I just wondered what others experiences have been ... I have met 3 lovely couples in my time here and I did attend one night of the SS birthday party ...
Here's the but !!
Sometimes I feel as if single guys are tolerated rather than totally accepted from what i can see the up coming socials are aimed solely at couples and single women being Saturdays ... yes there is the question of club rules which in the whole exclude single guys on a Saturday..... Fridays are usually a no go for me due to work commitments ...now I expect a flurry of "find yourself a plus one !! " easier said than done ... Before anyone says it I have asked without success ...
i regularly ask myself the question.... "should i stay or should I go " SS has become a party of my daily routine... morning noon and night ...could I leave I don't know ... it would be a hard decision ...
I am not the most confident contacting people sure lots of you know that ... never know what to say really..can't remember a couple or single lady contacting first it may well have happened but at my age the memory is not what it was ... so do single guys get contacted ??
I feel every one assumes it's easy being single , plenty of time ,plenty of money not always easy from my point of view I have real life stuff that means some planning has to be involved just can drop everything at a moments notice ...
if you have got this far you have done well thanks....

Right now Mr @MP386 listen here and listen good!
Anyone that knows me knows I don't do anything I don't want to do. I don't 'tolerate' anyone. I either talk to them regardless of if they are male, female, couple, black, white, skinny or larger.
I am organising the SS Central party at the VA later in May. When I spoke to @Admin or in ally about this one of the first things I asked for was if he could find out if there was any way what so ever of allowing single gents to attend. He asked and tried his best but at the end of the day the club rules are the club rules.
My reason for wanting single gents on the social, as I explained to Admin are not because I want a single gent. US as a couple are not looking for either a single gent or a single female for that matter. My reason was simply that I felt single gents get a rough deal. It's not practical to hold socials on a Friday as people have work etc and if there is any travel to the venue it rules it out really. So, most socials are held on a Saturday, unfortunately this means single gents miss out unless they can find a plus one for the night.

Please don't think that anyone 'tolerates' you, if they didn't want to chat to you then I'm sure they wouldn't!
We all think about the single gent and how things are sometimes unfair but there is little that we can do to change the way the clubs are run.

We luvs ya! If you disappear we will have a stalking party out searching for you. When they find you I can't even begin to describe what they'll do to you! lol
Sometimes you just have to be patient, so what if you have to naked the first move! If you don't you may just miss the opportunity of a lifetime!!

 

[Never_say_Never]

Oops a few typo's there but you get the gist of what I'm saying!

 

[Therapon]

Not something I have thought about ... probably wouldn't happen but there seems to be a couple of clubs that are the favourites here ... VA ... Charms .... both with exclusion policies....

Can't remember the thread but this has been discussed before and I have to agree this is not something that would be easy to set up. However you say that most, but I assume not all fridays are difficult to arrange time off. Maybe it's a matter of trying to plan in advance as you did for the VA and if you can do that then a club location is a possibility.

 

[Deleted member 1030]

Right now Mr @MP386 listen here and listen good!
Anyone that knows me knows I don't do anything I don't want to do. I don't 'tolerate' anyone. I either talk to them regardless of if they are male, female, couple, black, white, skinny or larger.
I am organising the SS Central party at the VA later in May. When I spoke to @Admin or in ally about this one of the first things I asked for was if he could find out if there was any way what so ever of allowing single gents to attend. He asked and tried his best but at the end of the day the club rules are the club rules.
My reason for wanting single gents on the social, as I explained to Admin are not because I want a single gent. US as a couple are not looking for either a single gent or a single female for that matter. My reason was simply that I felt single gents get a rough deal. It's not practical to hold socials on a Friday as people have work etc and if there is any travel to the venue it rules it out really. So, most socials are held on a Saturday, unfortunately this means single gents miss out unless they can find a plus one for the night.

Please don't think that anyone 'tolerates' you, if they didn't want to chat to you then I'm sure they wouldn't!
We all think about the single gent and how things are sometimes unfair but there is little that we can do to change the way the clubs are run.

We luvs ya! If you disappear we will have a stalking party out searching for you. When they find you I can't even begin to describe what they'll do to you! lol
Sometimes you just have to be patient, so what if you have to naked the first move! If you don't you may just miss the opportunity of a lifetime!!

Wow! That was awesome! Remind me not to upset you!

so what if you have to naked the first move!

Naked? Freudian slip?