We have the opposite problem. Mr N starts work at 3am on Sunday morning. That rules out Saturdays at any club. Fridays aren't really our scene at the VA (Saturday us much better) so he has to book a day off work if we want to go on a Saturday xx
Single Guys On The Swinging Scene
- Thread starter MP386
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It was, it was one of a few typo's! Sorry got on my soapbox and just typed lolWow! That was awesome! Remind me not to upset you!
Naked? Freudian slip?
But I really did try hard as did Admin to get single gents allowed even if it was just a few. But it wasn't to be xx
D
Deleted member 1030
I genuinely meant it was an awesome post
Yes, I know it is something that the site and a lot of members are keen on at socials.
Don't know how this is going to come across, don't wish to offend anyone but this is our take on this post...
When we first joined the site we were only looking to meet couples but we didn't ignore or block single guys or girls, we were open to talk to all, our outlook has since changed and our profile reads we will meet single males, but they really have to put effort into it aswell...sometimes we feel as though we are doing alot of the chasing and that shouldn't be the case. We have never had a single male initiate a meet even though it is on our profile. We do attend clubs on a Friday as well as a Saturday but due to work commitments Nigel has to take half a day off to do so on a Friday....everybody has financial, work and family commitments that affect things, both couples and singles.
@MP386 from what we have seen you speak to alot of people on here, us included and alot of couples talk back to you...we don't get to meet some of the peeps we'd like to either, but that's how it goes and we except that.... can you say hand on heart that you have not been given the opportunities and not taken them up?
When we first joined the site we were only looking to meet couples but we didn't ignore or block single guys or girls, we were open to talk to all, our outlook has since changed and our profile reads we will meet single males, but they really have to put effort into it aswell...sometimes we feel as though we are doing alot of the chasing and that shouldn't be the case. We have never had a single male initiate a meet even though it is on our profile. We do attend clubs on a Friday as well as a Saturday but due to work commitments Nigel has to take half a day off to do so on a Friday....everybody has financial, work and family commitments that affect things, both couples and singles.
@MP386 from what we have seen you speak to alot of people on here, us included and alot of couples talk back to you...we don't get to meet some of the peeps we'd like to either, but that's how it goes and we except that.... can you say hand on heart that you have not been given the opportunities and not taken them up?
Is this thread Single guys on SS or should it be how single guys are treated in swinging overall and swinging clubs?
I ask because this really does look like single guys get a bashing on here. Genuinely.
You can't go on Saturday's due to club rules.
You can go on Friday's but choose not to.
So, after reading the posts here, am I right in saying that the generalisation is not of this site, is not of how guys are treated here overall, but moreso the club policies of single guys in as much due to their rules??
We tried but club rules are club rules and as a site who supports clubs that support us, we can't keep applying pressure on clubs to allow us exclusive rights to sneak in some single guys on a traditional couples' night, even if we bend over backwards to support the clubs.
I'm good friends with some good people... if I can't do it, then it won't happen. (Whether rightly or wrongly.)
Some people are given chances, do they truly follow them up? Really?
I ask because this really does look like single guys get a bashing on here. Genuinely.
So go to clubs on a Friday - if you have work commitments then take the day off?
You can't go on Saturday's due to club rules.
You can go on Friday's but choose not to.
So, after reading the posts here, am I right in saying that the generalisation is not of this site, is not of how guys are treated here overall, but moreso the club policies of single guys in as much due to their rules??
We support clubs who support us and of course, that means there's members here who have ties to some clubs.
I tried really hard, even with the weight of myself and the site behind it - we tried and tried, I called in a favour and it was still a no.
We tried but club rules are club rules and as a site who supports clubs that support us, we can't keep applying pressure on clubs to allow us exclusive rights to sneak in some single guys on a traditional couples' night, even if we bend over backwards to support the clubs.
I'm good friends with some good people... if I can't do it, then it won't happen. (Whether rightly or wrongly.)
Some people are given chances, do they truly follow them up? Really?
Think this is directed more at clubs and really should be changed to reflect this as its clear reading comments this is not an assumption on Ss single gents
Can an organiser here, help with this and have an event that includes our single gents on the site? Please?
Also please check out @SwindonSwingers who allow single guys in on a Friday and Saturday night, but please be mindful it is a gay sauna who host monthly swinging events.
They're on the site but not active.
I can tell you now, as I see where you're coming from @MP386 - if @Pearls and I had a club, we would open it to all and simply have capping measures in place. That simple.
Sadly we haven't and until such time (if ever lol) we have to go with what is out there, whether we like it or not.
Right catch you later peeps and have an amazing evening.
MP if you need to talk, you know where we are okay?
Also please check out @SwindonSwingers who allow single guys in on a Friday and Saturday night, but please be mindful it is a gay sauna who host monthly swinging events.
They're on the site but not active.
I can tell you now, as I see where you're coming from @MP386 - if @Pearls and I had a club, we would open it to all and simply have capping measures in place. That simple.
Sadly we haven't and until such time (if ever lol) we have to go with what is out there, whether we like it or not.
Right catch you later peeps and have an amazing evening.
MP if you need to talk, you know where we are okay?
If this first social at The VA goes well then maybe we put the feelers out and see if people would be interested in a Friday night event? It suits us better as Mr N wouldn't have to take time off then!
What you think @MP386?? xx
What you think @MP386?? xx
MOTM
This has in no way any reflection on you ... I agree fridays are not good ... for me being self employed... no holiday pay I lose a day's work and earnings as I did when I went to the Birthday party the VA isn't a five minute drive away ....Right now Mr @MP386 listen here and listen good!
Anyone that knows me knows I don't do anything I don't want to do. I don't 'tolerate' anyone. I either talk to them regardless of if they are male, female, couple, black, white, skinny or larger.
I am organising the SS Central party at the VA later in May. When I spoke to @Admin or in ally about this one of the first things I asked for was if he could find out if there was any way what so ever of allowing single gents to attend. He asked and tried his best but at the end of the day the club rules are the club rules.
My reason for wanting single gents on the social, as I explained to Admin are not because I want a single gent. US as a couple are not looking for either a single gent or a single female for that matter. My reason was simply that I felt single gents get a rough deal. It's not practical to hold socials on a Friday as people have work etc and if there is any travel to the venue it rules it out really. So, most socials are held on a Saturday, unfortunately this means single gents miss out unless they can find a plus one for the night.
Please don't think that anyone 'tolerates' you, if they didn't want to chat to you then I'm sure they wouldn't!
We all think about the single gent and how things are sometimes unfair but there is little that we can do to change the way the clubs are run.
We luvs ya! If you disappear we will have a stalking party out searching for you. When they find you I can't even begin to describe what they'll do to you! lol
Sometimes you just have to be patient, so what if you have to naked the first move! If you don't you may just miss the opportunity of a lifetime!!
as for plus ones equally a problematic ... reference my original post ...
I was trying to get some feed back of how single gents feel ....
Thank you for luv in me... it's good to know ..
it's easy to say make the first move not so easy in practice ...
A
andymitel
Ok here's my two pennyworth... (apologies in advance!!)
The reality is that there are far more single guys out there than ladies or couples that would like to play with them. So let's just accept that. It is therefore very difficult for guys to be 'selected' - it's simply against the odds.
So the best way to approach this is by personal contact, and the best way to do this is by going to events - accepting that some clubs have rules about which days...
The challenge here is that some clubs experience the problem of single guys lining the walls and appearing predatory. This is made worse when clubs charge more for single guys who then 'expect' to get something for their money.
The predatory nature is why many clubs have exclusive nights for couples and single ladies - to provide them with a comfortable non-predatory evening.
Having said that, there are quite a few 'greedy girls' who want to experience multiple guys, and this needs to be accommodated.
So in short what's the answer? Well I'm afraid that there is no easy answer, and guys will just have to work hard at building their verifications by being seen as polite, respectful, and work on word of mouth referrals...
Here Enders the sermon from andymitel....
The reality is that there are far more single guys out there than ladies or couples that would like to play with them. So let's just accept that. It is therefore very difficult for guys to be 'selected' - it's simply against the odds.
So the best way to approach this is by personal contact, and the best way to do this is by going to events - accepting that some clubs have rules about which days...
The challenge here is that some clubs experience the problem of single guys lining the walls and appearing predatory. This is made worse when clubs charge more for single guys who then 'expect' to get something for their money.
The predatory nature is why many clubs have exclusive nights for couples and single ladies - to provide them with a comfortable non-predatory evening.
Having said that, there are quite a few 'greedy girls' who want to experience multiple guys, and this needs to be accommodated.
So in short what's the answer? Well I'm afraid that there is no easy answer, and guys will just have to work hard at building their verifications by being seen as polite, respectful, and work on word of mouth referrals...
Here Enders the sermon from andymitel....
MOTM
I was just trying to get some feed back how single gents here feel ... it's as difficult for some of us to do Fridays as it is a couple ...
Swindon ... gay sauna ? Don't honestly think that's for me would be further than the VA. ...
I am fine thanks ...
MOTM
It would be good yes ... provide I can afford at the time to lose a day's money and pay for entry and a hotel if I couldn't then I wouldn't be able to go Friday or not ... .... the clubs policy has been debated many times which I know will never change ..
D
Deleted member 4901
This site has always been really welcoming. Especially as I'm a very mixed bag. I agree that I find clubs rules very restrictive. Without a female date there are events I cannot attend. Which is more frustrating for me because I'd love to be able to go as "Gypsy" in a feminine capacity than any feeling of being discriminated against as a male.
In there defence, there are clubs I can go to as a TV where I can feel just as comfortable but seeing as there are so many on here I'd love to meet again, maybe I could suggest organising a social we can all attend? Perhaps a list of venues or events open to all might be something for @MP386 to bring as a positive solution.
Did I mention I'm free from tomorrow evening for adventures and can travel if anyone is feeling an itch they might like scratched?
Also looking for a partner to attend the VA with at the end of the month if anyone wants to come?
*blatant self advertising ^^^*
In there defence, there are clubs I can go to as a TV where I can feel just as comfortable but seeing as there are so many on here I'd love to meet again, maybe I could suggest organising a social we can all attend? Perhaps a list of venues or events open to all might be something for @MP386 to bring as a positive solution.
Did I mention I'm free from tomorrow evening for adventures and can travel if anyone is feeling an itch they might like scratched?
Also looking for a partner to attend the VA with at the end of the month if anyone wants to come?
*blatant self advertising ^^^*
MOTM
I'll leave that one to you NigelDon't knock it till you try it :bj1:
D
Deleted member 4901
As always while I was typing you all got there ahead of me. Xxx
Love and cuddles.
Accepts any punishment gladly. :smackpaddle:
Love and cuddles.
Accepts any punishment gladly. :smackpaddle:
MOTM
It's easy to say take a day off if your an employee with holiday pay .. yes I did take a day for the VA party because I wanted to actually meet some more people hear but financially it was a costly night out ... it's not a case of I choose not to it's a case of I cannot afford to lose the money on a regular basis .. we all have commitments to fulfill ...Is this thread Single guys on SS or should it be how single guys are treated in swinging overall and swinging clubs?
I ask because this really does look like single guys get a bashing on here. Genuinely.
So go to clubs on a Friday - if you have work commitments then take the day off?
You can't go on Saturday's due to club rules.
You can go on Friday's but choose not to.
So, after reading the posts here, am I right in saying that the generalisation is not of this site, is not of how guys are treated here overall, but moreso the club policies of single guys in as much due to their rules??
We support clubs who support us and of course, that means there's members here who have ties to some clubs.
I tried really hard, even with the weight of myself and the site behind it - we tried and tried, I called in a favour and it was still a no.
We tried but club rules are club rules and as a site who supports clubs that support us, we can't keep applying pressure on clubs to allow us exclusive rights to sneak in some single guys on a traditional couples' night, even if we bend over backwards to support the clubs.
I'm good friends with some good people... if I can't do it, then it won't happen. (Whether rightly or wrongly.)
Some people are given chances, do they truly follow them up? Really?
It's just not a cheap lifestyle if you want to get to the clubs guaranteed.
OK, Mr N gets holiday pay for his time off but we can still spend over £250 on one night out when you consider room, entry, drinks, fuel. And that's without me buying a new outfit to wear!
It's a choice we all have to make, we don't go often, not nearly as often as I'd like but it's a treat to get out to the clubs. Other than that it's conversation on here xx
M
MickeyBlueBalls
Keen to know which clubs they are mate as I have a similar issue as MP....can you enlighten me? Cheers bud.
D
Deleted member 1030
Can't claim to have a list from off the top of my head lol but, for example, our local club, Paradise Spa allows in single guys on a Saturday night.
M
MickeyBlueBalls
Great stuff. That's rare though. Thanks mate.
D
Deleted member 1030
I agree, it's all too rare, but there are some out thereGreat stuff. That's rare though. Thanks mate.
T
Terryg
The Attic in Derby as well apparently. Single guys on Saturday that is!
MOTM
This seems to have wandered in to a thread about clubs ...
i joined here and have spent time trying to get to know people here ... if I wanted to go to a random club there is one very local ...never been ...
This was about socials to meet people from here ...
i joined here and have spent time trying to get to know people here ... if I wanted to go to a random club there is one very local ...never been ...
This was about socials to meet people from here ...
M
MickeyBlueBalls
Some valid points but to put it into context - it's a couples lifestyle. As a single gent I accept I am merely a guest and here mainly for the social banter and should I be lucky enough to meet a couple (none so far) then that would be great. Reading a thread the other night I don't think it's a single gent problem but a confidence issue perhaps or maybe some of the lesser experienced just don't know how to approach single guys. But I do get where you're coming from and a little while ago was also considering if I should leave or not. Thing is I'm here , like you, because I enjoy the social side to the site. There's some great members here. My expectations are to be honest limited at best but in the meantime I'll crack on having the crack with you all. The single guy club thing is a load of bollocks though, as if she were on the other foot and single ladies were restricted and overcharged there'd be murder on the streets. Hang in there bud, you're a great guy and a valued member and I for one would be sorry to see you go.