'where Do We Belong' ?

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Lovestruckcpl

Hi all :),

Firstly, I hope we are posting this in the correct section...apologies if not.

Have you ever asked yourself this question...'Where do we / I belong' in terms of the vast array of sexual fetishes, deviations and lifestyle choices out there?
For us it's something we have pondered long and hard in our journey so far. We have been members on general dating sites, adult dating sites, cuckold and fetish dating sites and now here at a swingers site :)....BUT....where do we really fit in the mix of it all.
Obviously the general dating site was a complete waste of time because people there were either searching for a soul mate or trying to get a 'bit on the side'.
The adult type dating sites were largely full of 'send us a pic then lets meet for a shag on Saturday' types...again, most of which were married and wanted a bit on the side (not being judgmental here, we once considered a married man would be safer in terms of discretion and not getting too involved).
And then came the 'cuckold' sites where to be fair we learnt quite a lot and did make a few online friends, but the whole 'cuckold' fetish thing didn't fit either...and we were told on more than one occasion that we were more swingers than a 'cuckold' couple.
And so here we are :D!...BUT (he says yet again)...are a couple where the wife plays and the husband either takes part or watches termed swingers?
We do feel more comfortable here than anywhere I have to say :love:,...it was just a thought that does or has anybody else had the same dilemma in finding a 'home' for their particular kink?
Just labels I suppose at the end of the day...but labels do incur expectations of whats in the package don't they?

Thoughts anyone...?

J n J x
 
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Admin

Admin

Admin
15 September 2014
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Lovestruckcpl said:
BUT (he says yet again)...are a couple where the wife plays and the husband either takes part or watches termed swingers?
Click to expand...
Hello J & J, that's an interesting read...
I quoted what I feel is most relevant and my answer to this simply is - yes.
You tick a lot of people's boxes, but most of all know your OWN desires and wants - which is the most important thing.
But yes, that's part of the swinging umbrella :)

PS it's excellent to know you feel so at home too.
Best wishes
Admin :) x
 
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Therapon

Therapon

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11 August 2015
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Just read this I know where you are coming from. I recently separated and with that came the freedom to explore my own wishes/fantasies/kinks or whatever label you want to tag to them. Personally I have a foot in the bsdm and swinging camps and whilst a lot of people seem to think these are mutually exclusive I, and a lot of others here, would totally disagree with that sentiment.
Where do I belong - I honestly do not know. The only way I'm going to find out is to explore further but even then I expect the result will be more questions than answer - such is life.
It's also good to hear you feel comfortable here, Admin & Pearls put a lot of effort into trying to make this site what it is, fun, tolerant and somewhere where you can ask such questions. All I can add is I hope you have fun finding out :)
 
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Z

zebo

We (@Mz-Zebo and myself) are from a bdsm background, we have been into that scene for many many years, but we found that exploring another side with a female sub has brought us into this lifestyle too, so we happily class ourselves as belonging to both places. We had very little experience ( and still havn't ) with regards swinging, but the folks in here made us both feel very welcome, and the more we joined in the more at home we felt. We found out that its not just about the swinging scene but also the social side of things too, so we can relax, have a laugh, and be flirty too, so for us, its not just about pigeonholing yourself into this particular 'activity' its enjoying the site, the camaraderie, and the banter for what it is.
 
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Admin

Admin

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Indeed and it's this that makes our site unique.
In time, as the site expands, things will become different for a lot of people where we will have more people here who share the same ideas and tastes - making meetings more achievable.
Considering we're coming up to almost one year online, we're doing very well. However, Rome wasn't built in a day and in a bit more time, the site will expand farther and there will be more opportunities to meet like-minded people.
 
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D

Deleted member 2610

Twice divorced and fed up with ordinary dating sites. Wanted to be involved in something different, what that is...well that's why I'm here and I can honestly say really enjoying this great site, hopefully making friends as we go a long. Being a single male had it's barriers but hopefully over time these will come down. For now onwards and enjoyment Xxx
 
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M

meet_the_fockers

Hmmmm boxes, pigeon holes, labels.. neat little packages tided up in bows?
Heres our journey which is ever evolving ever changing... does anyone fit in a certain place?
Ive always liked girls/women. My first encounter with the same sex was at 15.
I put this behind me married.. blah blah.
It ended.
I met my now partner.. told him of my feelings. We joined a site, not this one.
We had many threesomes.. mainly for myself.
But then things shifted.. I enjoyed the company of women. But.. i was increasingly finding it more of a turn on watching him with the lady. And telling him what to do. Weird we where confused.. cuckqueen?? perhaps?
We ventured to clubs... i found myself in the dungeon.. whip in hand punishing.. men what for? Because they liked it loved it. Theyd sit by my feet, terrified to move..on a lead and collar but loving it. Domme??
i sprawled out on a table in a dungeon with a lady and a strapon, enjoyed the audience and applause.. exibisionist????
I can also be very submissive with my partner.. and all sweetness and light.
I can also turn and tie him up.. and do whatever i feel like with him.. Switch????
Love to watch a show two ladies an orgy? Voyeur???

So do you see my point??
You fit in anywhere where you feel comfortable.. its constantly evolving..
you dont have to fit into one neat box..
you can fit in several..
you can jump from one box to another.. so long as your enjoying yourself.. and are comfortable in the box you are in at the time who cares.. :D xxx
 
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Looby&Lew

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Bansheewarrior said:
Good read and agree since been here sure beats where I was 1000 times great welcomes and nice to see a Admin join in. I sat on reading great comments and likes and best bit is the giggles that I have had since being here and I thank those who made that happen think they know who they are. Great people great site. One thing missing a coffee machine lol .
Click to expand...
Still waiting! X:whistle::D
 
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M

meet_the_fockers

Bansheewarrior said:
Good read and agree since been here sure beats where I was 1000 times great welcomes and nice to see a Admin join in. I sat on reading great comments and likes and best bit is the giggles that I have had since being here and I thank those who made that happen think they know who they are. Great people great site. One thing missing a coffee machine lol .
Click to expand...
Ah we wouldnt want to replace the one we have.. ;) :rofl:
 
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