How Do You....

Never_say_Never · 18 April 2017

Sammy said:
M

I work with family and kids who are at risk and vulnerable
So there are some very very sad situations thst in this day and age we shouldn't be dealing with

So I'm generally trying to find ways n means of supporting them ...

So where I work the local stats are 1 in 2 kids go to bed hungry each night , where national average is 1-5

So the heads usually buzzing with who what when where how

Anywhoooo that's one of reasons for not switching off

I see no reason why our children should be in this sad state of affairs. I was a single mum of 3 for years, I went without so my kids never had to. I wouldn't eat for 2-3 days so I could put a meal on the table for my children. I know this sounds old fashioned but I even made my daughters party dresses from remnants of material or old clothes of mine.
Why on earth are our children going hungry, why are they being mistreated when they should be the most precious thing we own?
My daughter is now a special needs teacher in a very deprived area. The stories she tells me breaks my heart. It's all so unnecessary.
So, I take my hat off to you @Sammy, you do a wonderful job in a very demanding field xx

MP386 · 18 April 2017

MP386 said:
Depends on the job really but usually estimate/quote individual jobs but I do work in day rates if that's why comes up ... x

I have atrocious spelling ...."what comes up "...

BoltonBiFemCpl · 18 April 2017

Sammy said:
M

I work with family and kids who are at risk and vulnerable
So there are some very very sad situations thst in this day and age we shouldn't be dealing with

So I'm generally trying to find ways n means of supporting them ...

So where I work the local stats are 1 in 2 kids go to bed hungry each night , where national average is 1-5

So the heads usually buzzing with who what when where how

Anywhoooo that's one of reasons for not switching off

I have to admit I am a real bad ass at work when dealing with our clients but hats off to you I could not deal with that I would be in bits every day

Sammy · 18 April 2017

Never_say_Never said:
I see no reason why our children should be in this sad state of affairs. I was a single mum of 3 for years, I went without so my kids never had to. I wouldn't eat for 2-3 days so I could put a meal on the table for my children. I know this sounds old fashioned but I even made my daughters party dresses from remnants of material or old clothes of mine.
Why on earth are our children going hungry, why are they being mistreated when they should be the most precious thing we own?
My daughter is now a special needs teacher in a very deprived area. The stories she tells me breaks my heart. It's all so unnecessary.
So, I take my hat off to you @Sammy, you do a wonderful job in a very demanding field xx

I couldn't agree with you more
The scared fact is now a days we have a group in every community that's called working poor

Or we have families whose benefits are sanctioned n stopped without valid reasons

That's two just small examples

I am lucky to work for a charity
That does remarkable work

It's truly difficult to explain because so many people are in situations through no fault of their own

Thank you for your lovely comments n sorry for hijacking the thread

Sammy · 18 April 2017

Beds_Bi said:
Mine starts as soon as I walk out of the building, I take a big breath in then let it out slowly whilst lifting and dropping my shoulders, that usually does the trick.
I do cry and get frustrated sometimes when there are similar things to what Sammy has described or there has been a child death, then I talk it through with my boss ( xx

Sending you huge hugs xx

Sammy · 18 April 2017

Stew said:
And she's darned good at it so proud of her x

BoltonBiFemCpl said:
I have to admit I am a real bad ass at work when dealing with our clients but hats off to you I could not deal with that I would be in bits every day

lol I am that bad ass , I will give hugs and cuddles and support when needed but kick ass when needed , be under no illusions they send in they 5.4 short arse to deal with the bad lads

Never_say_Never · 18 April 2017

Sammy said:
I couldn't agree with you more
The scared fact is now a days we have a group in every community that's called working poor

Or we have families whose benefits are sanctioned n stopped without valid reasons

That's two just small examples

I am lucky to work for a charity
That does remarkable work

It's truly difficult to explain because so many people are in situations through no fault of their own

Thank you for your lovely comments n sorry for hijacking the thread

Do not apologise, I myself was one that had benefits stopped and had to repay loads because they miscalculated them in the first place. This then left me below the poverty line. I was told by citizens advice that there was little I could do as by the time my appeal would be heard it would have been paid back.
I wouldn't have minded but I was working part time, going to uni to better my qualifications and trying to raise 3 children. I wasn't the stereo typical sat on my backside person raking in benefits. But no matter what, my kids never went hungry. It may not have been the most nutritional diet but they got fed xx

Sammy · 18 April 2017

Never_say_Never said:
Do not apologise, I myself was one that had benefits stopped and had to repay loads because they miscalculated them in the first place. This then left me below the poverty line. I was told by citizens advice that there was little I could do as by the time my appeal would be heard it would have been paid back.
I wouldn't have minded but I was working part time, going to uni to better my qualifications and trying to raise 3 children. I wasn't the stereo typical sat on my backside person raking in benefits. But no matter what, my kids never went hungry. It may not have been the most nutritional diet but they got fed xx

It's story's like yourself that not told ,

If you'd had right advice at time there ways round all these things and shouldn't have been left in that position

Power to you for what you've done it's not easy !!!

On a side note if anyone is struggling with benefits etc
Feel free drop me a mail if I don't know answer I certainly find it for you quick enough

Xx

Never_say_Never · 18 April 2017

Sammy said:
It's story's like yourself that not told ,

If you'd had right advice at time there ways round all these things and shouldn't have been left in that position

Power to you for what you've done it's not easy !!!

On a side note if anyone is struggling with benefits etc
Feel free drop me a mail if I don't know answer I certainly find it for you quick enough

Xx

I did what I had to do, fortunately my children were quite young and don't really remember the tough times. But you grow strong, you fight and you never give up! xx

AutumnH · 18 April 2017

Never_say_Never said:
Switch off?
Mr N recently commented that I need to learn to switch off when I come home from work. He says I need to make my brain shut down. No thoughts of work or home or chores, just chill out.
How does everyone manage to do this?
My brain just doesn't ever stop! xx

Like a few people, I also work from home. Nice idea on paper, in reality, probably the worst thing I have ever done because I can't get away from work!
As for switching off, do something which you want to do, Mrs. @Never_say_Never Even if it doesn't involve Mr.
Have some time to yourself: Go for a walk, go to the cinema by yourself, read a book, go for a drive, go do/see that thing you always wanted to do but never got around to....look after yourself.

Beds_Bi said:
Mine starts as soon as I walk out of the building, I take a big breath in then let it out slowly whilst lifting and dropping my shoulders, that usually does the trick.

Another good method. But I've been keeping an eye on everyone's posts, and those of you who have difficult jobs (@Sammy lookin' at you, kid!) have you considered counselling?
I'm not saying go for psychotherapy (they cost £50 per hour!), but just go for a few sessions of counselling because sometimes it helps to talk to somebody outside of your situation. Counsellors do not give advice, nor tell you what you should say to the boss, or not say to the partner, they're there to listen impartially, non-judgemental, strictly confidential and accepting of who you are.

Just a thought

Colin · 18 April 2017

Sammy said:
On a side note if anyone is struggling with benefits etc
Feel free drop me a mail if I don't know answer I certainly find it for you quick enough

Xx

If your on JSA and ESA or know anyone who is or know anyone who is sanctioned tell them that there IS help. If your money is stopped you can go to the council and fill in a Nil Income form. That will reinstate rent and council tax and give access to further help like meter credits, foodbank vouchers and emergency cash payments. This info is not readily availeable. The authorities will only deal with it if you ask specifically for it

Sammy · 18 April 2017

Colin said:
If your on JSA and ESA or know anyone who is or know anyone who is sanctioned tell them that there IS help. If your money is stopped you can go to the council and fill in a Nil Income form. That will reinstate rent and council tax and give access to further help like meter credits, foodbank vouchers and emergency cash payments. This info is not readily availeable. The authorities will only deal with it if you ask specifically for it

Hey mr Colin
We speak the same lingo sir !!!
Xxx

Sammy · 19 April 2017

AutumnH said:
Like a few people, I also work from home. Nice idea on paper, in reality, probably the worst thing I have ever done because I can't get away from work!
As for switching off, do something which you want to do, Mrs. @Never_say_Never Even if it doesn't involve Mr.
Have some time to yourself: Go for a walk, go to the cinema by yourself, read a book, go for a drive, go do/see that thing you always wanted to do but never got around to....look after yourself.

Another good method. But I've been keeping an eye on everyone's posts, and those of you who have difficult jobs (@Sammy lookin' at you, kid!) have you considered counselling?
I'm not saying go for psychotherapy (they cost £50 per hour!), but just go for a few sessions of counselling because sometimes it helps to talk to somebody outside of your situation. Counsellors do not give advice, nor tell you what you should say to the boss, or not say to the partner, they're there to listen impartially, non-judgemental, strictly confidential and accepting of who you are.

Just a thought

You are very wise Miss Autumn
Yes I have been offered it and have considered taking it

However I'm a funny old burd
I'm hard on outside and soft on inside ... Like to deal with things in my own way ... head in sand and arse in the air - clearly it isn't working

So yes I will probably consider taking up the offer

I've found a new sounding board in last 9 mths which has helped greatly

Wonder who that could be

Pearls · 19 April 2017

I struggle to switch off

Pearls · 19 April 2017

Stew said:
Switch off what miss

Plenty of stuffs

MickeyBlueBalls · 20 April 2017

In my line of work never. I'm practically wired in 24/7. Comes with the turf unfortunately which is why I'm on here until ridiculous o clock sometimes.

MickeyBlueBalls · 20 April 2017

cinnamon_giggles said:
My brain doesn't switch off, I've found vigorous exercise helps (oo-er )

Or being unconscious

I can help with that!

MickeyBlueBalls · 20 April 2017

cinnamon_giggles said:
Is that help with vigorous exercise till I'm unconscious?

Noted

Sure unconscious after would be my preference over beforehand. I've run out of chloroform! Muhahaha.

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