Letting Down Gently..

Lips_Pearls · 30 September 2020

I'm sure this has been brought up before; probably an Old Chestnut..
But if someone's not for you, how do you say no?
Are you cut-throat about it or do it gently?

When you do it gently, persistence tends to occur. So what do you find is best?
Direct and to the point?
Or still remain friendly but - thanks but no thanks. x

AutumnH · 30 September 2020

Direct and to the point. Rip that plaster off!
It's just simpler to be direct, rather than beat around the bush imo

Lips_Pearls · 30 September 2020

AutumnH said:
Direct and to the point. Rip that plaster off!
It's just simpler to be direct, rather than beat around the bush imo

Ooooft... Straight to the point, quicker than a Spaniel checking coke. Love it. x

Deleted member 19022 · 1 October 2020

AutumnH said:
Direct and to the point. Rip that plaster off!
It's just simpler to be direct, rather than beat around the bush imo

I believe you can be direct but at the same time tactful. If then the person is still persistent then you have the block option.

AutumnH · 1 October 2020

kev1960 said:
I believe you can be direct but at the same time tactful. If then the person is still persistent then you have the block option.

I never said I wouldn't be tactful, and I've never had to block anyone. I mean be direct as in saying something like "I'm very flattered but I'm not interested, thank you for getting in touch. Good luck on the site."

Direct, and to the point.

Deleted member 8095 · 1 October 2020

We tend to be direct but polite. We use a pretty standard response, something like thank you and good luck with your search but if they persist then I can get quite narky and very blunt BUT I should say that I dont like that approach as I understand how much courage it can take to make the initial contact and some people just can't take a hint, even when its delivered on the face of a sledge hammer? (P)

Deleted member 19022 · 1 October 2020

AutumnH said:
I never said I wouldn't be tactful, and I've never had to block anyone. I mean be direct as in saying something like "I'm very flattered but I'm not interested, thank you for getting in touch. Good luck on the site."

Direct, and to the point.

I never said you weren't being tactful either. I said that you can be direct and tactful at the same time. That is only my opinion, as has been quoted by another couple it takes courage sometimes to send an initial message. Therefore if you are lucky or unlucky as the case may be to receive a message then it's polite to let them down gently. This is only my opinion and I'm not accusing anyone else of being rude or ill mannered in the manner they reply to someone.

Guru G · 1 October 2020

Lips_Pearls said:
I'm sure this has been brought up before; probably an Old Chestnut..
But if someone's not for you, how do you say no?
Are you cut-throat about it or do it gently?

When you do it gently, persistence tends to occur. So what do you find is best?
Direct and to the point?
Or still remain friendly but - thanks but no thanks. x

My issue is finding an interested party to find out ?

Lips_Pearls · 1 October 2020

Mr gorgeous1 said:
My issue is finding an interested party to find out ?

Aye. We hear you.. (CV to one side)... ? ?

Deleted member 19022 · 1 October 2020

Mr gorgeous1 said:
My issue is finding an interested party to find out ?

Don't worry you are not alone ?

GeoffRy · 2 October 2020

AutumnH said:
Direct and to the point. Rip that plaster off!
It's just simpler to be direct, rather than beat around the bush imo

Direct and to the point ?. So when are the three of us gonna get nekkid and beat some Bush then.?. Direct enough you sassy minx ?.
Xx G

Deleted member 18050 · 2 October 2020

To be honest to get a reply of any kind would be nice ,I have used another well known site for several years and after sending dozens of messages, I can count on one hand the amount of replies saying no thank you
otherwise they just read and ignore my message that’s why I don’t approach people anymore.
So far on here I have had one extremely good response ,one ignored message and one that I think is a fake account

MP386 · 2 October 2020

Curiousbob247 said:
To be honest to get a reply of any kind would be nice ,I have used another well known site for several years and after sending dozens of messages, I can count on one hand the amount of replies saying no thank you
otherwise they just read and ignore my message that’s why I don’t approach people anymore.
So far on here I have had one extremely good response ,one ignored message and one that I think is a fake account

Unfortunately that’s the nature of the beast , it does get disheartening but it takes persistence and if no one replies or ignores you or even blocks you , just move on ,it may sound a little mercenary but you will find there are some great people here , from my experience and what I’ve always been told you have to be more proactive as a single man as there are so many of us chasing the same thing ....

AutumnH · 2 October 2020

GeoffRy said:
Direct and to the point ?. So when are the three of us gonna get nekkid and beat some Bush then.?. Direct enough you sassy minx ?.
Xx G

Still waiting for you to give me a date, time and location

Carpediem2008 · 2 October 2020

To be fair we prefer to be firm but polite... its doesnt really matter how you do it... you can never predict how the other party or parties will respond... we've had both positive and negative reactions when saying no thanks... so just rip of the plaster ... no sense wasting time explaining yourself over and over.... politeness is key though.x

Deleted member 11852 · 2 October 2020

Curiousbob247 said:
To be honest to get a reply of any kind would be nice ,I have used another well known site for several years and after sending dozens of messages, I can count on one hand the amount of replies saying no thank you
otherwise they just read and ignore my message that’s why I don’t approach people anymore.
So far on here I have had one extremely good response ,one ignored message and one that I think is a fake account

Don’t worry, I am sure you will get a meet when this virus buggers off xxx M

Deleted member 18050 · 2 October 2020

Welshcouple59 said:
Don’t worry, I am sure you will get a meet when this virus buggers off xxx M

Thank you,I definitely hope it goes away soon x

GeoffRy · 2 October 2020

AutumnH said:
Still waiting for you to give me a date, time and location

Oooh roll on the end of lockdown , I will get my devious planning head on. Xx G

MyKinkyWorld · 2 October 2020

I think you can be direct and go straight to the point but at the same time be polite, anyway, in my experience most people simply go over and ignore people and messages they don't like.

Lips_Pearls · 2 October 2020

MyKinkyWorld said:
I think you can be direct and go straight to the point but at the same time be polite, anyway, in my experience most people simply go over and ignore people and messages they don't like.

Sadly true. But to quote a quote that is on trend for various reasons - “it is what it is”.

Miss-Sexy-Legs · 2 October 2020

Im quite direct in what and who interests me, if you send me an unwelcome pic then on your own head be the backlash, if your a dom then theres no interest whatsoever for me in you , but i do tell the messager, and i will put a stop effective from the off to anyone annoying me

Therapon · 2 October 2020

Miss-Sexy-Legs said:
Im quite direct in what and who interests me, if you send me an unwelcome pic then on your own head be the backlash, if your a dom then theres no interest whatsoever for me in you , but i do tell the messager, and i will put a stop effective from the off to anyone annoying me

Blimey why you still talking to me

Therapon · 2 October 2020

As most have already said if there is no intetest then it's best to be polite but firm and if that fails I'd have no problem making it very clear.

CocoDD · 2 October 2020

Lips_Pearls said:
I'm sure this has been brought up before; probably an Old Chestnut..
But if someone's not for you, how do you say no?
Are you cut-throat about it or do it gently?

When you do it gently, persistence tends to occur. So what do you find is best?
Direct and to the point?
Or still remain friendly but - thanks but no thanks. x

I’m nice if they are nice and after if someone still persists then I won’t be nice, depends really but the gentle approach usually works. ?

GeoffRy · 2 October 2020

I do have an issue with people that don't read the profile and jump straight in with a request.
If you can't be bothered to read what we've taken the time to write for your benefit, why would I waste more time politely educating them?
I make a point of reading profiles, it's only polite. XxRy

Letting Down Gently..

Lips_Pearls

AutumnH

Lips_Pearls

Deleted member 19022

AutumnH

Deleted member 8095

Deleted member 19022

Guru G

Lips_Pearls

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GeoffRy

Deleted member 18050

MP386

AutumnH

Carpediem2008

Deleted member 11852

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Letting Down Gently..

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