Spanking , Flogging And More

That was a synthetic cane, twelve stripes with a very hard player. I stopped after the skin was broken which disappointed her a little however can't really go on after that

Pearls, I understand your thoughts however they are yours, not hers or mine. It was a consensual scene, negotiated and stopped before the negotiated conclusion because of the broken skin. For her it was enjoyable, and for her it was not kink that had gone further than it should.

Pearls said:

That’s too far even to my liking and I don’t mind pain. Just too far in my opinion but others could disagree

Click to expand...

One thing that you dont hear much of, is the spankers limit.
I (Mart) tend to level out before any sub has asked me to stop.
I enjoy spanking, whipping, flogging a sub, but I tend to hold back on the power.

sthwalescpl said:

One thing that you dont hear much of, is the spankers limit.
I (Mart) tend to level out before any sub has asked me to stop.
I enjoy spanking, whipping, flogging a sub, but I tend to hold back on the power.

Click to expand...

Indeed, I've just started a thread on this very subject.

Pearls said:

They are my thoughts and sadly we see things we don’t want to see in the fetish scene which we are a part of. I can not begin to understand why a submissive would want such a beating to that extent. I can only surmise it’s for image purposes. Like I said just my opinion and like yourself others may disagree.

Click to expand...

Saw an incredibly experienced (teaches) guy using a bullwhip, on willing volunteers in a set of stocks.
Each person would agree to let him know when they had reached their threshold. He would start soft and very gradually work up. Every victim loved it.
All was going well, until one lady just didn't want to stop, to the point where he was drawing blood, and stopped. She asked him to continue, and he refused. She was pretty miffed, seeming to take it as an insult against her that he wouldn't beat the crap out of her.

Welshcouple59 said:

See this is why I could never be a Dom..or drift too far towards Bdsm..it's because I know if I started flogging someone with anything as soon as I hear ouch or you bastard,,you cunt or any other words of endearment to say that hurt slightly then I would put whatever I was using down and feel completely guilty that I had hurt someone..w..

Click to expand...

I was like this at the beginning with Jayne, (and then others) until she convinced me that people enjoy it.

Welshcouple59 said:

It's just one of them things that's not for me… I just can’t bring myself to do it

Click to expand...

I completely understand that.

When I were a lad (cue 4 Yorkshiremen sketch)... one of the things my old man drummed into me from a very early age was “you don’t hit women, ever. You’re going to be bigger, taller and stronger; you have an obligation to be aware of that… you don’t hit a woman. Ever. EVER.”

As a result, when I did meet the woman who ‘topped me from the bottom’ and introduced me to spanking her… there was a mental wall there, until I was utterly, wholly and completely convinced that this was different.

BUT, even with that, spanking’s as far as I go. I can’t even watch flogging or more severe ‘punishment’. I stress this is solely me-being-me. I don’t have any moral objection or anything to it; I don’t feel an inappropriate (for it would be highly inappropriate) urge to ‘protect’ anyone from being hit, say. But I just can’t even watch it, let alone partake in it.

Welshcouple59 said:

This is exactly the same hurdle I could never get past..I know people in that lifestyle have total trust in each other but in my head would always be I've hurt a woman and that would totally hurt me more than any whip or flogger could...but that's not saying it's wrong in anyway at all just that I wouldn't be able to do it..w..

Click to expand...

Yep; exactly.

Welshcouple59 said:

This is exactly the same hurdle I could never get past..I know people in that lifestyle have total trust in each other but in my head would always be I've hurt a woman and that would totally hurt me more than any whip or flogger could...but that's not saying it's wrong in anyway at all just that I wouldn't be able to do it..w..

Click to expand...

Its admirable that you feel that way.
What helped me was listening to Jayne when she was saying that, so long as I didnt cross any boundaries, being spanked or flogged is enjoyable to her, it turns her on, and she gets to a heightened state when we indulge. So, slowly I worked up to where she now knows that I'm able to judge how far to go.
Its still a bit of a learning curve with people I dont know, but communication is the key.

sthwalescpl said:

communication is the key.

Click to expand...

This is something that newcomers to the scene, re D/s or not, learn quickly, or never at all. And the latter never last long, in my experience.

I am what is termed a "sensual Dom"
I arrived at this point after years of conflict within myself due to the fact that I do not enjoy inflicting pain but I do enjoy giving pleasure to a submissive. I found that some submissives enjoyed more pain than I was willing to inflict.
So now I will only indulge in giving spankings, whippings etc. within MY boundaries and this must be understood by the submissive beforehand.
A few months ago I had the pleasure of bare ass spanking an Italian girl who responded to being spanked like no other girl I've ever know. Practically orgasming with every stroke. I only used my hand and a small crop but eventually, I decided to stop. She asked me to continue but, despite the temptation (and it is very tempting when a female submissive is literally squirming with pleasure) I refused as despite only using "soft" tools I could see that had I continued it would only be a matter of minutes before her skin would have been broken and blood forthcoming. As it was her cheeks were turning purple. I was a little concerned but she was delighted. At the end of the day, I was the Dom and it was my decision that she'd had enough.

It is up to the Dom as the one holding the hand, flogger, paddle, crop, whip or whatever to gauge the situation and decide when enough is enough as there are many submissives who will never ask to stop. Sometimes it's because of their sheer masochistic natures but often it's simply because they don't want to be seen as weak or "not a good sub" (or even, as @Pearls mentioned because they have become either physically or mentally "numb" .

Antogs

My girlfriend is very much a sub and we are looking for someone like you