Swinging Not Dating

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8 July 2018
5,053
13,025
Ok guys and girls this is going to be a little long winded but it's something that has to be said.
So first do you all know what swinging is?

I honestly believe quite a few have some idea but not fully understand the whole life style choice this is. This is exactly what it is, a lifestyle choice.
This is not dating and I must emphasise this. Not Dating.

Dating is where you date and build up a relationship from there, there are plenty of sites out there that can provide a dating service but we are not one of them.
Swinging is all about having fun.
Couples Know exactly what this is all about, they know that having that extra person or two, or three in their bed is what it's all about.

We have a couple here looking for a gang bang, I know that men want it but haven't got the guts to approach this.
I know of one lady here that I met twice at our birthday bash, she knows exactly what swinging is, she wants to have fun with couples and singles and do so most weekends with no strings attached.

I know of another lady who has no intention of dating or looking for a relationship, she just wants fun with no commitment.
I know of many men that are the same.

People have also become couples in this scene but that has been after a fair while of meeting and realising that they were meant to be together.
What I am saying is, we have created a genuine safe site, where all accounts are real but this is a genuine swinging site not a dating site.
If you want dating then join a dating site.

The members we want here are swingers and swingers only, this is how it should be, it's about time people started having fun and enjoy what this life style has to offer.

It's great having a genuine site but we do need to realise why everyone is here and why you joined.
@Nigel&Julie it was actually you that got me thinking on this and I know you will see where I am coming from. x
Just thought I’d resurrect this thread as we’ve had a lot of new people join lately!
:tiphat:
Tiger xx
 
9 January 2018
924
3,291
City
Norwich
I'd never seen it before but a lot of it struck a chord. On another site you often hear people say "you can use the site how you like" but my thought has always been why come on a swinging site if you don't want to swing? Some people make it so obvious they are only on the site to find a partner and we find it a complete turn off.

Thinking back we've met quite a few bunny-boilers (male and female) over the years and also seen the problems non-swingers can cause.
 
25 July 2016
634
3,663
57
City
Tamworth
Honestly thought this was a new thread, when it popped up. Have taken the time to read most of the posts, mainly the first few pages.
@Pearls original post is so true. We came across this site by chance many years ago and have been here ever since. We took a break from here and swinging , because we were frustrated with both the scene and the lack of interest in meets, both on here and another sites. In the early days here we struggled because of our location, but since coming back we have advertised several times, looking for a meet ( well in advance). Still had no luck , and now we are forced into a break with this lockdown.
Yes I agree with other comments regards the site as become more of a social meeting place, where people can talk openly without being judged. Plus many have joined because the lifestyle intrigues them and want to look. I think we are all to blame, and maybe during this current lifestyle break we all need to think why we are here, to have fun? Or to talk and dream.
 
19 March 2015
23,755
64,856
I wonder how many people here, have blurred lines between the two?
Perhaps one side believes there’s a chance more than the other.
Maybe they get confused between swinging with NSA and a romantic attachment and involvement.

Sometimes it can be a dead giveaway with posts from people and you just know they’re too invested when they ought to know better.

I wonder actually, just how many people come here to seek and find and then try to get emotionally involved with others.
In fact, more now than ever tbh. ? x
 
livvye123

MOTM

12 April 2021
269
1,446
City
Maidstone
After my last relationship finished, I realised that my first love will always be my job. I found dating sites full of rude idiots and I actually don’t ‘need’ someone in my life. So for me this site gives me the opportunity to meet like minded people to explore my desires with, without all the dating crap . What I will say is that because we are all here for one reason, it makes for far more respectable and lovely conversations which I have found very refreshing - whether I eventually meet them or not.
 
10 July 2018
1,289
3,775
What I will say is that because we are all here for one reason, it makes for far more respectable and lovely conversations which I have found very refreshing - whether I eventually meet them or not.
Couldn’t agree more.

The respectful and friendly element isn’t unique to this site, but it’s definitely one of the reasons I hang around. And the absence [in this lifestyle] of sex being something ‘that you just don’t talk about’ is refreshing and very nice indeed.

What I’ve always liked about it is that there’s a still a very thick line between crudity and adult conversation (which is encouraged and enjoyed) and crassness, which is still a non-starter. Those who unable to learn the distinction don’t tend to hang around long.
 

Vanezza

Stud Muffin
11 May 2017
11,328
37,226
50
After my last relationship finished, I realised that my first love will always be my job. I found dating sites full of rude idiots and I actually don’t ‘need’ someone in my life. So for me this site gives me the opportunity to meet like minded people to explore my desires with, without all the dating crap . What I will say is that because we are all here for one reason, it makes for far more respectable and lovely conversations which I have found very refreshing - whether I eventually meet them or not.
Respectful, of course, I respect everyone unless there is a reason not to. Lovely, maybe not as much. The thing I really like is making people giggle and that has served me well over the years in both relationships and sex. ??

N xxx
 
9 January 2018
924
3,291
City
Norwich
When we first met it was just sex, then it went to a FWB (or 'fuck me friends' as a mate used to say) and then we caught feelings. Luckily we both did and I remember the first time it was mentioned. I'd organised a party in a posh flat in the London, post fuck Debs suddenly said "You know I'm falling for you, don't you". I said "Falling? I've already fallen" and that was that. 2 months later we were living together and nearly 20 years later here we are. Neither of us were looking for it but when it happened it was just right.

Luckily :)
 
13 August 2015
675
2,980
City
Liverpool
When we first met it was just sex, then it went to a FWB (or 'fuck me friends' as a mate used to say) and then we caught feelings. Luckily we both did and I remember the first time it was mentioned. I'd organised a party in a posh flat in the London, post fuck Debs suddenly said "You know I'm falling for you, don't you". I said "Falling? I've already fallen" and that was that. 2 months later we were living together and nearly 20 years later here we are. Neither of us were looking for it but when it happened it was just right.

Luckily :)
That's a wonderful story! Thank you for sharing ??
 
13 August 2015
675
2,980
City
Liverpool
Yes, I know what dating and swinging are and I don't confuse the two - it's just that for me, having casual fun with virtual strangers (I'm talking about the people you've never met before and literally don't know from Adam) is impossible for me.

I need to have some form of connection with people, not even a romantic one, in order to have fun. I'm not looking for commitment from the liaisons I have, so in my eyes I'm not dating.

I know that's not the way it works for most people, but that's how my sexuality has developed over the years and believe me, it is extremely frustrating!

(Sorry for the rant, I think I felt a bit seen by this!)
 
9 January 2018
924
3,291
City
Norwich
Yes, I know what dating and swinging are and I don't confuse the two - it's just that for me, having casual fun with virtual strangers (I'm talking about the people you've never met before and literally don't know from Adam) is impossible for me.

Now you see this is one of the things that I like about swinging, and socials in particular. We don't think like that and yet I bet if we met you at a social we could still have a drink, chat and laugh although it's unlikely anything else would happen given our differences in thinking.

That to us is what this site is all about.

Viva la Difference
 
13 August 2015
675
2,980
City
Liverpool
Now you see this is one of the things that I like about swinging, and socials in particular. We don't think like that and yet I bet if we met you at a social we could still have a drink, chat and laugh although it's unlikely anything else would happen given our differences in thinking.

That to us is what this site is all about.

Viva la Difference
That's my point though, we'd have a drink and chat and laugh and if anything comes of it, great, if not, then that's fine.

My point is that I can't decide I'm going to have sex with someone and make that happen, it doesn't work that way for me.
 
livvye123

MOTM

12 April 2021
269
1,446
City
Maidstone
Yes, I know what dating and swinging are and I don't confuse the two - it's just that for me, having casual fun with virtual strangers (I'm talking about the people you've never met before and literally don't know from Adam) is impossible for me.

I need to have some form of connection with people, not even a romantic one, in order to have fun. I'm not looking for commitment from the liaisons I have, so in my eyes I'm not dating.

I know that's not the way it works for most people, but that's how my sexuality has developed over the years and believe me, it is extremely frustrating!

(Sorry for the rant, I think I felt a bit seen by this!)
I agree with you - you do need that connection, to talk and laugh. Like you say I don’t want to date them!!
 
D

Deleted member 11852

As a couple we definitely know the difference but there still has to be a connection there.. Not necessarily a sexual connection but we both need to feel comfortable around the people we are thinking about meeting up with.. This is the reason we don't like clubs,, we can't just get it on with someone we have never met.. The connection is not like a relationship with potential meets.. More like friends with benefits.. We want to be able to chat and have a laugh with but at the same time the friendship stays on the swinging side of our marriage and will never cross into our personal life.. I think you have to keep the two things separate.. Almost like living a double life.. It's a strange thing to explain but keeping the two things separate is a must.. Our personal family life is just for us and the swinging side is like escapism to fun and friendship.. When we have weekends away and have meets family life stays at home.. Then once we leave the hotel going home we're back to family life.. It sounds weird but it works for us.. W.. ?
 
15 March 2020
2,028
5,382
We all know it happens that people find others, become close friends and dating could happen, and fall in love, it's happened and happened here. However, I think if you came to a site like Social Swinging looking for the afore mentioned then I think they will find a very lonely place and probably won't stay longer than 5 minutes.

I am also sure that there are some who join, stick around but are ultimately looking for someone more long term.

I'm just here for the Jaffa cakes and Jelly and ice cream.
 
livvye123

MOTM

12 April 2021
269
1,446
City
Maidstone
We all know it happens that people find others, become close friends and dating could happen, and fall in love, it's happened and happened here. However, I think if you came to a site like Social Swinging looking for the afore mentioned then I think they will find a very lonely place and probably won't stay longer than 5 minutes.

I am also sure that there are some who join, stick around but are ultimately looking for someone more long term.

I'm just here for the Jaffa cakes and Jelly and ice cream.
Ooh when do I qualify for that ?!