Swinging Not Dating

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26 July 2016
2,347
3,886
City
Bolton
Ermmmm at the risk of setting this thread on fire again and having read how its not happening for some folks. Just how many of you have messaged someone from the site that you have never met before about meeting up.
 
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17 March 2017
2,729
3,984
City
Manchester
Thing is we speak to many people when they first join, all staff do and it's mostly questions about how swinging works. These new members when they initially join have no clue what to expect and so it's our job to educate and advice the best we can, I know @Miss-Sexy-Legs will agree on this as we spend so much time in PMs with new members.
So as @Lulu mentioned we spoke and again I offered my help regarding what swinging is, this is when we got talking about dating and if there was much difference in it. After a very long chat I think we finally got there.
We have had men here that have wanted relationships after meeting, one lady even sent a report because this person couldn't understand why she didn't want a relationship (he ended up being banned for many other reasons also. He got very stalkerish.
So this is why we try to educate as much as we can and make threads that are educational, we have a new generation now of swingers, young people who have no idea what it's all about and are confused between swinging and dating. If we can help with keeping swinging swinging then our job is complete. ;)
Id be happy with that lol x
 
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28 December 2016
612
1,350
City
Leicester
Ok... so we are like millenia late for this thread it is true.
However we would just like o point out that we love to fuck ;)
But we love to fuck those we have a little connection with. Chemistry makes everything worth it for us.
We use the site to socialise with view to meeting those we click with at a club because our circumstance dictates mainly club play for us so the private meets are reserved for those we have met before or those special few we really click with lol.
Please form an orderly queue at the VA on Friday ;)
We did have 5 veri's but some have left the site and our veri's seemed to dissapear with them :(
 
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9 September 2017
1,142
2,864
54
I find it inconceivable that people don't reply to messages. But then again I'm not being bombarded with the sort of rude and/or offensive messages that some seem to be (truth be told I'm not bombarded with messages full stop :cool:)
I reply to all messages received as soon as I see them and always will.
 
24 February 2016
764
2,415
City
Baldock
I find it inconceivable that people don't reply to messages. But then again I'm not being bombarded with the sort of rude and/or offensive messages that some seem to be (truth be told I'm not bombarded with messages full stop :cool:)
I reply to all messages received as soon as I see them and always will.
Yep same here
 
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Arb

3 September 2017
160
653
45
City
Oxford
The latest account deletion request says it all;
"Please delete my account as I have found someone"

Swinging, not dating!

Does it really?
I didn’t join to date, but nothing stays the same forever situations change.

I agree though to the whole swinging not dating ethos.
 

Admin

Admin
15 September 2014
39,126
95,492
Does it really?
I didn’t join to date, but nothing stays the same forever situations change.

I agree though to the whole swinging not dating ethos.
In this case yes 100% - the account had mentioned being on the rebound and looking for a partner. :)
It's one of those things and as you say, the ethos is what is important here. It's a swinging site not a dating site. (y)
 
7 April 2018
212
645
City
Coddington
I am dating at present but I dont want to date and then leave the site, for me I want to date someone in the lifestyle and continue to swing and grow together and have new experiences as I will never want to have a ‘normal’ sex life with just one person.

I’ve tried all the normal dating sites and it never works, they either think its repulsive to swing and dont want to ‘share’ me (im not your property but that's another discussion) and then you get the guys who then think you are a slut and they can just shag you and not make you a real girlfriend.

So for me if someone i start to meet on here or through a club night becomes an fb/fwb and then from their we become a couple thats an ideal situation for me.

Sorry if a bit rambly but hope it makes sense
 
19 March 2015
23,755
64,897
I wonder how many people, still, genuinely understand this lifestyle over those who don't?
I.E - people who see swinging as a gateway into getting a relationship or seeing it as dating not swinging..

There's a definite increase of people using swinging as a means to date. Rather than the opposite.
Is the clock ticking on swinging itself online, as a way to finding genuine, friendly, honest & open like-minded people?
 
10 July 2018
1,289
3,808
I wonder how many people, still, genuinely understand this lifestyle over those who don't?
I.E - people who see swinging as a gateway into getting a relationship or seeing it as dating not swinging..

There's a definite increase of people using swinging as a means to date. Rather than the opposite.
Is the clock ticking on swinging itself online, as a way to finding genuine, friendly, honest & open like-minded people?
I’ve certainly noticed a change over the years I’ve been around the scene. Back in the days when I was actively involved - attending clubs, meeting - there were plenty of couples who’d met while swinging, and some who were quite open to meeting someone for a long term thing in the scene…

...but almost no one who was part of the scene hoping to meet someone for that, no one in the scene actively looking for a partner. I haven’t been able to say that for a couple of years; have seen far more of those. Which always puzzles me, and it shouldn’t. It’s no odder than a couple who meet while not swinging and who then get into it. Things change, people change, and with one exception¹, I’m certainly not going to criticise anyone’s motives for being in the scene. It just puzzles me.

¹the one exception being fellas, both single and as part of a couple, who come into the scene solely because they reckon it’s sex on tap and every woman in the scene will fuck anyone.
 
19 March 2015
23,755
64,897
I’ve certainly noticed a change over the years I’ve been around the scene. Back in the days when I was actively involved - attending clubs, meeting - there were plenty of couples who’d met while swinging, and some who were quite open to meeting someone for a long term thing in the scene…

...but almost no one who was part of the scene hoping to meet someone for that, no one in the scene actively looking for a partner. I haven’t been able to say that for a couple of years; have seen far more of those. Which always puzzles me, and it shouldn’t. It’s no odder than a couple who meet while not swinging and who then get into it. Things change, people change, and with one exception¹, I’m certainly not going to criticise anyone’s motives for being in the scene. It just puzzles me.

¹the one exception being fellas, both single and as part of a couple, who come into the scene solely because they reckon it’s sex on tap and every woman in the scene will fuck anyone.
Agreed, it's an odd situation. Almost like we're in some plateau. A stagnant phase perhaps.
Modern apps do not help as they have normalised swing/dating and NSA sex.
Maybe that's what it is my friend...
 
10 July 2018
1,289
3,808
Modern apps do not help as they have normalised swing/dating and NSA sex.

Genuinely hadn’t occurred to me, but I think you’re right.

I certainly remember being surprised three or four years ago when I heard a popular dating (not swinging) app referred to as a ‘shagging app’, so yeah, that blurring has been going on for a while.

Maybe that's what it is my friend...

I suspect that’s exactly it.
 
19 March 2015
23,755
64,897
Maybe that's what it is my friend...
I suspect that’s exactly it.
I tend to concur and see some things that maybe are the edge of what it is. Admittance is the final step before progression after all, isn't it. When you admit and realise, you can address and move forward.
I certainly remember being surprised three or four years ago when I heard a popular dating (not swinging) app referred to as a ‘shagging app’, so yeah, that blurring has been going on for a while.
Yeah I think it has and it's been normalised. The mystery has gone. A magician is now no longer a magician but an illusionist...
The clock is ticking I think. I genuinely do. Cultures change. People change. Society changes. In 5 years, look at how we have changed.
How many clubs have admitted it and shut up shop? Too many. Like pubs...
There's a change in direction. Has been for a little while.
 
Pearls

MOTM

18 July 2015
55,089
120,746
I tend to concur and see some things that maybe are the edge of what it is. Admittance is the final step before progression after all, isn't it. When you admit and realise, you can address and move forward.

Yeah I think it has and it's been normalised. The mystery has gone. A magician is now no longer a magician but an illusionist...
The clock is ticking I think. I genuinely do. Cultures change. People change. Society changes. In 5 years, look at how we have changed.
How many clubs have admitted it and shut up shop? Too many. Like pubs...
There's a change in direction. Has been for a little while.
Spot on. (y)Xx
 
14 February 2017
859
3,224
City
London
Here to swing, not date. I've known some ladies over the years that I quickly worked out would only meet with a view to date and hopefully get a relationship out of it, otherwise we're not interested.
Hard pass for me.

If it happens, it happens (and can do), but don't actively seek it is my advice.

So, here to swing. :)
 
15 February 2018
70
745
City
Tamworth
I'm here for no strings. It's harder as you find two types of people who don't get it - the ones who get jealous about you meeting other people, who start taking as if you're a couple. And the types who aren't looking for friendships but for quick hook ups with the nearest woman who'll meet and only ever message when they're horny. Happily I've seen pretty much neither of these on this site but it's what makes me frustrated with other sites...
 
MP386

MOTM

9 November 2015
28,445
66,452
58
I think I answered this when the thread started, I never started swinging hoping to meet a partner, I’m still happy being on my own but someone regular a friend to share good times with , no real strings attached can that happen with someone regular? Don’t know ...
so swinging for me isn’t dating ....