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Vanezza

Stud Muffin
11 May 2017
11,326
37,264
50
It can be difficult, but some make it fairly obvious. At one end of the scale, profiles that have only male pics, but claim to be a couple is a fairly obvious one, especially the longer they have been on site. Then its picking up on other red flags, a single guy thats only on very late at night (had to wait for the missus to go to bed lol) or a "female" who's pics turn out to be from the web. With couples, it can be harder to pin it down, they can have a real profile, in that they are a couple, yet they don't seem to be able to commit to meeting... real life does throw curveballs into the mix (we currently are finding it hard to find time for anything other than work, family and caring for a very ill relative). But the longer it goes on, the more likely it is that they like the idea, the fantasy, of swinging, but the reality is they wont ever actually take that final step and do it. Some may even attend group socials, or even 1-2-1 socials, safe in the knowledge that they can dip a toe in, and be "seen on the scene" but not have to bump uglies with others lol. Some love to swap long, erotic messages going into detail about what they would like to do, collect pics, and generally get their jollies online without having to put in the legwork for real and actually meet.
Sites with some form of verification process are helpful, but this can be a double-edged sword...just because a couple or single have veries saying others have socialised with them, doesn't mean they are a dyed-in-the-wool, bona-fide swinger, it just means others have spent time in their company in a social setting.

Bottom line, it's all down to you and your tolerance for BS...how long do you get strung along, how many potential red-flags do you ignore before you decide to cut your losses and concentrate your efforts elsewhere.
I agree with some of your early comments on this post but most of the rest is up for debate.
Vanessa started this account on here because at the time she was expanding her sexuality, having only been with two men all her life. We both spent some time on other sites then she found this one. We have stopped swinging now and make no pretense we are still into the lifestyle but we have met many friends along the way and had sex with some and losing them is always a blow even when it is only virtual. I stick my nose in because I enjoy it and not because I'm a swinger.

N xxx
 
17 August 2021
1,499
4,200
It can be difficult, but some make it fairly obvious. At one end of the scale, profiles that have only male pics, but claim to be a couple is a fairly obvious one, especially the longer they have been on site. Then its picking up on other red flags, a single guy thats only on very late at night (had to wait for the missus to go to bed lol) or a "female" who's pics turn out to be from the web. With couples, it can be harder to pin it down, they can have a real profile, in that they are a couple, yet they don't seem to be able to commit to meeting... real life does throw curveballs into the mix (we currently are finding it hard to find time for anything other than work, family and caring for a very ill relative). But the longer it goes on, the more likely it is that they like the idea, the fantasy, of swinging, but the reality is they wont ever actually take that final step and do it. Some may even attend group socials, or even 1-2-1 socials, safe in the knowledge that they can dip a toe in, and be "seen on the scene" but not have to bump uglies with others lol. Some love to swap long, erotic messages going into detail about what they would like to do, collect pics, and generally get their jollies online without having to put in the legwork for real and actually meet.
Sites with some form of verification process are helpful, but this can be a double-edged sword...just because a couple or single have veries saying others have socialised with them, doesn't mean they are a dyed-in-the-wool, bona-fide swinger, it just means others have spent time in their company in a social setting.

Bottom line, it's all down to you and your tolerance for BS...how long do you get strung along, how many potential red-flags do you ignore before you decide to cut your losses and concentrate your efforts elsewhere.
Another problem that I see, as I guy who is always peaking in the windows trying to find a way in, there doesn't seem to be a way to try it or go slowly or see what it is all about. I think a lot of the ones " who wont take the final step" are scared to death and dont know what to do.
It would be the difference between starting a business you know nothing about, and working for someone first and learning the business before starting your own business.
 
17 August 2021
1,499
4,200
Clubs would fill that need.
If you can get into one.
Here in the US, the majority can't.
And I think a club, even though I have never been to one, would be overpowering to someone who wasn't sure they were into it.
I would think that would be a second or third step.
You meet someone who is into it, they bring you to the club.
Or maybe you have a threesome, then you try a club.
 

Vanezza

Stud Muffin
11 May 2017
11,326
37,264
50
If you can get into one.
Here in the US, the majority can't.
And I think a club, even though I have never been to one, would be overpowering to someone who wasn't sure they were into it.
I would think that would be a second or third step.
You meet someone who is into it, they bring you to the club.
Or maybe you have a threesome, then you try a club.
Are there no genuine sites for US swingers or is it all just sales?
Not at all that I want you to go from here because you are an interesting guy to chat with, I'm just wondering.

N xxx
 
Last edited:
17 August 2021
1,499
4,200
Are there no genuine sites for US swingers or is it all just sales?
Not at all that I want you to go from here because you are an interesting guy to chat with, I'm just wondering.

N xxx
I haven't found a genuine US site yet.
They are all set up to get you to spend more money. They send you alerts about soneone who is checking your profile and is interested and wants to meet you. You check thier profile and they are not what you checked in preferences. Then you get contacted by people who are not what you are looking for and you know the site told them you were interested.
Everything is an additional fee.
There is a new one I just found that I am going to try, as soon as everthing at my house stops breaking so I can afford to join.
I stay here because at least I can chat here.
 

Vanezza

Stud Muffin
11 May 2017
11,326
37,264
50
I haven't found a genuine US site yet.
They are all set up to get you to spend more money. They send you alerts about soneone who is checking your profile and is interested and wants to meet you. You check thier profile and they are not what you checked in preferences. Then you get contacted by people who are not what you are looking for and you know the site told them you were interested.
Everything is an additional fee.
There is a new one I just found that I am going to try, as soon as everthing at my house stops breaking so I can afford to join.
I stay here because at least I can chat here.
I could set my VPN to pretty much anywhere in the US and do an extensive search in your area if you like. I'm not sure it would help but you never know.
Oh and Admin might tell me off for luring you to somewhere else but that isn't my plan. I'm trying to help you get your rocks off! 🤣

Just promise to stay here and I won't get in trouble again ok? 😂

N xxx
 
17 August 2021
1,499
4,200
I could set my VPN to pretty much anywhere in the US and do an extensive search in your area if you like. I'm not sure it would help but you never know.
Oh and Admin might tell me off for luring you to somewhere else but that isn't my plan. I'm trying to help you get your rocks off! 🤣

Just promise to stay here and I won't get in trouble again ok? 😂

N xxx
Sure, I can use all the help I can get.
But what are you searching for, a site for me to join?
And, I will never leave here.
I wish I could meet people like the ones on this site, in real life.
 

Vanezza

Stud Muffin
11 May 2017
11,326
37,264
50
Sure, I can use all the help I can get.
But what are you searching for, a site for me to join?
And, I will never leave here.
I wish I could meet people like the ones on this site, in real life.
I can search for people, private swingers parties with invites, sites, pretty much anything. I am very good at finding things on the internet, it's sort of my thing.
The only problem single men have here (aside from finding compatible people in the first place) is the double price on the door of clubs, which I personally find ridiculous and unfair but that has been going for years and probably will never stop.

N xxx
 
17 August 2021
1,499
4,200
I can search for people, private swingers parties with invites, sites, pretty much anything. I am very good at finding things on the internet, it's sort of my thing.
The only problem single men have here (aside from finding compatible people in the first place) is the double price on the door of clubs, which I personally find ridiculous and unfair but that has been going for years and probably will never stop.

N xxx
You can try and good luck.
The only private parties and clubs I have found do not allow single men, ever, at any price .
Women and couples have to be a certain type and have above average looks.
So far, I have only found three clubs in the whole country that will allow single men. They are all a 4 hour airplane ride away, you have to apply to join and they wont tell you if your application was accepted in advance, you have to ask at the door. I assume they say your application is still pending if they dont like how you look or dress.
As for paying double, as I have said before, business is business. They are going to charge as much as the market will allow. As long as there are 10X as many men as women who want in, and men are willing to pay and women are smart enough to not go if they have to pay double, or at all, they will continue to charge single men double .
And I never saw a social advertised.
Closest city to me is New Haven, Connecticut.
Boston Massachusetts and New York city would be overnight trips, but are close enough to me.
 

Vanezza

Stud Muffin
11 May 2017
11,326
37,264
50
You can try and good luck.
The only private parties and clubs I have found do not allow single men, ever, at any price .
Women and couples have to be a certain type and have above average looks.
So far, I have only found three clubs in the whole country that will allow single men. They are all a 4 hour airplane ride away, you have to apply to join and they wont tell you if your application was accepted in advance, you have to ask at the door. I assume they say your application is still pending if they dont like how you look or dress.
As for paying double, as I have said before, business is business. They are going to charge as much as the market will allow. As long as there are 10X as many men as women who want in, and men are willing to pay and women are smart enough to not go if they have to pay double, or at all, they will continue to charge single men double .
And I never saw a social advertised.
Closest city to me is New Haven, Connecticut.
Boston Massachusetts and New York city would be overnight trips, but are close enough to me.
It's a challenge I admit but I fucking love a challenge my man.

Limiting the number of men would be much fairer in my opinion. That means more work for the club owners but it is their job to make the place comfortable for the clients so in my opinion it should be monitored that way rather than by cash alone. Plus, Isn't equality supposed to apply to everyone?

N xxx
 
25 July 2016
2,496
6,696
Ymichael14 did a quick search dont know if you know of these.
  • All "swingers club" Results in New Haven, CT. Showing 1-7 of 7.
  • Keepers Gentlemen's Club. 6.8 mi. ...
  • Scruples Lounge. 15.8 mi. ...
  • Mr Happy's Cafe. 20.0 mi. ...
  • Men in Motion Dancers. 7.4 mi. ...
  • Mystique Gentlemen's Club. 16.3 mi. ...
  • The Male Encounter Revue. 11.7 mi. ...
  • Pure Platinum Gentlemen's Club. 13.1 mi.
 

Vanezza

Stud Muffin
11 May 2017
11,326
37,264
50
Ymichael14 did a quick search dont know if you know of these.
  • All "swingers club" Results in New Haven, CT. Showing 1-7 of 7.
  • Keepers Gentlemen's Club. 6.8 mi. ...
  • Scruples Lounge. 15.8 mi. ...
  • Mr Happy's Cafe. 20.0 mi. ...
  • Men in Motion Dancers. 7.4 mi. ...
  • Mystique Gentlemen's Club. 16.3 mi. ...
  • The Male Encounter Revue. 11.7 mi. ...
  • Pure Platinum Gentlemen's Club. 13.1 mi.
Col baby you have even more time on your hands than I have! 🤣

N xxx
 
17 August 2021
1,499
4,200
I love how G can piss people off and start a fight, everytime.
I swear he could just post " good morning" and someone would say" what do you mean by that? It's raining out, how can it be a good morning"?
G has a gift.
A very annoying gift, but still, a gift.