The Totally New Quiz Results And League Thread

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5 July 2016
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9,823
City
Ossett
The dark towers of Quiznor loomed as the Quiz Master stepped from the boat. His man-at-arms, @Admin , stared blackly at the sheer walls of ignorance before them. "It looks like whoever built this place didn't know an awl from an auger," he muttered.
"Let us begin," resolved the QM, "this battle must be won before the day is out!"
"Well, it's quarter-past eight already!" said Admin. At that very moment, one of the enemy quizzers stuck their head above the parapet.
"Look, can you give us five minutes? I forgot to have a wee, sorry!"
"Oh, go on then!" QM and Admin looked at each other, the sky, the ground, their fingernails, each other again. "Did you see th...."
"OK, we're ready now!"
"At last," muttered QM, then screamed "CHARGE!!!!!"
Admin and QM ran into the castle. They came to a dark corridor, with piped music playing in the background. It was Wham!, which could only mean their first adversary was @Pearls who put up a fierce fight, but suddenly left without warning. They weren't expecting a new tactic from their next attacker, but @debE was not tied to someone else for a change and this almost threw our brave heroes. The challenges came thick and fast now, with a two-pronged attack from @Horny_Essex_Pair and @Baldricknkaz raining blows down on them and @Corfu_Connie_john came rushing at them, almost hidden from view. They then had to face a new foe, a masked berserker from the eastern middle-lands, known only as @Antogs The Quite Pervy.
Knowing that they still had their strongest challengers yet to face, QM drew his Sword of Bonus. It gleamed in the torchlight. (He had been gifted the sword by an old man in a marketplace who had told him, "It is a sword of deceit - flash it one way and it looks like a Simpsons question, flash it another and it will seem like it's something to do with chocolate bars. None shall guess its true nature! Hahahahahahahaha!!" and vanished in a puff of smoke. He was probably a vape user.)
@Nigel&Julie came at them with their usual ferociousness but were beaten back for once, while @Vanezza managed to steal the crown but were pole-axed by the Sword of Bonus.
QM and Admin surveyed the carnage, brave quizzers who had died with their quiz on and would go to Quizhalla to get questions wrong with the gods. They made to leave when, suddenly, a hand grabbed QM's ankle - Julie was down but not out! "Curse you, QM, the man in the marketplace was none other than Nigel" she croaked, "The bonus is Months!"

The Sword of Bonus shattered into a thousand pieces.

As they walked away from the castle, Admin stopped to read a warning that was posted on the gate. It simply read;
View attachment 44226
:tiphat: Epic write up as per usual. I do not know how you come up with this stuff but it is pure brilliance. Love it.

I'll look forward to @Admin write up after the guess the member quiz :whistle:

B x
 
D

Deleted member 1030

Captain's Log, stardate 231117:
We have received a distress signal from the planet EssEss in the ANSSCRQ system. It seems that the people of the planet are being subjected to weekly bouts of torture by a pair of cruel slavedrivers known only as Quizmaster and @Admin

Picard: Number one, gather an away team. Commander Data, what do we know about the inhabitants?
Data: They are a strange race, captain. Most of the time they wander around the forums; discussing fruit based biscuit-cakes, strange sexual practices and something they call "The Social". However, every Thursday night, they take shelter in the local tavern while the wicked overseers fire a series of bizarre enquiries at them. @RogerMore is the latest member of the clan to fall victim to this savage ritual, but others have been there a long time. @Baldricknkaz seems to be the rebel of the outfit, constantly being subjected to the punishment they call "points loss" with alarming regularity. There is a symbiote called @debE who, it seems, cannot function without being tied to another, a beautiful siren called @Pearls and @TherLegs who are cloned from colleagues of the overseers. @Lebexsex and @Horny_Essex_Pair have become established in the group and @Corfu_Connie_john seem to communicate admirably, despite being in a different timezone. From what I can establish, captain, the main players consist of the two-headed @Vanezza , who have a reputation for soiling the golden headgear adopted by the victors, and the recently returned warrior @SexyS . It would seem that inhabitant who displays the greatest prowess is the one they call @Nigel&Julie , who regularly defeats the toughest test known as "The Bonus".
Wesley Crusher: I don't understand, captain. Why would they do this to themselves every week?
Picard: Shut up, Wesley, you utter arse. Mr Worf, what does the aftermath of this.. this nonsense look like?
Worf: Well, hooray, I get a line. One line. At the end. It is because I am Klingon, is it not? Well, here goes: On screen now, captain.
quizleague231117.png
 
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Vanezza

Stud Muffin
11 May 2017
11,328
37,228
50
Captain's Log, stardate 231117:
We have received a distress signal from the planet EssEss in the ANSSCRQ system. It seems that the people of the planet are being subjected to weekly bouts of torture by a pair of cruel slavedrivers known only as Quizmaster and @Admin

Picard: Number one, gather an away team. Commander Data, what do we know about the inhabitants?
Data: They are a strange race, captain. Most of the time they wander around the forums; discussing fruit based biscuit-cakes, strange sexual practices and something they call "The Social". However, every Thursday night, they take shelter in the local tavern while the wicked overseers fire a series of bizarre enquiries at them. @RogerMore is the latest member of the clan to fall victim to this savage ritual, but others have been there a long time. @Baldricknkaz seems to be the rebel of the outfit, constantly being subjected to the punishment they call "points loss" with alarming regularity. There is a symbiote called @debE who, it seems, cannot function without being tied to another, and @TherLegs who are cloned from colleagues of the overseers. @Lebexsex and @Horny_Essex_Pair have become established in the group and @Corfu_Connie_john seem to communicate admirably, despite being in a different timezone. From what I can establish, captain, the main players consist of the two-headed @Vanezza , who have a reputation for soiling the golden headgear adopted by the victors, and the recently returned warrior @SexyS . It would seem that inhabitant who displays the greatest prowess is the one they call @Nigel&Julie , who regularly defeats the toughest test known as "The Bonus".
Wesley Crusher: I don't understand, captain. Why would they do this to themselves every week?
Picard: Shut up, Wesley, you utter arse. Mr Worf, what does the aftermath of this.. this nonsense look like?
Worf: Well, hooray, I get a line. One line. At the end. It is because I am Klingon, is it not? Well, here goes: On screen now, captain.
View attachment 44822
Synchronicity or coincidence? I was just Looking at some Trek stuff online :rofl:
Wonderful write up as ever, you really do deserve a big snog from us both :D;)
Thanks again our friend

N xxx
 
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Vanezza

Stud Muffin
11 May 2017
11,328
37,228
50
Brilliant write up how do you come up with this stuff, and top of the table yes :D

Vxxx:mwah:
 
D

Deleted member 1030

In deference to @Kwaka_Rider 's brilliant Hairy Porter thread, I'm going to do a straight-ish results thread this week and direct you there, instead :)

It was an easy quiz, this week - with a twist. Then the twist had a twist! :eek: We had a storming debut from @Jophanie (who seemed to tail off after the wine arrived) and a brave bash by @Pearls , who definitely could never be forgotten :whistle: a stormer from @Horny_Essex_Pair and @TherLegs and a noticeably under-Kazzed @Baldricknkaz :D.
The battle for the top spot did, of course, involve @Vanezza and @Nigel&Julie who both scored 20 in the main quiz...... could the tricky bonus question decide it? The clock ran down. With 2 seconds to go, I started to fist-pump the air - but Julie finally got her mind out of the gutter and remembered a Dong was also Vietnamese currency... claiming the 5 points and the crown! The Julinator is becoming unreachable in the league (y)
quizleague301117.png
Abnormal service will be resumed, next week folks! ;)