Singles (swingles) & Swinging.....

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14 February 2017
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3,224
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London
..An thats me cuaght up on this thread (hello all! sorry I've been away), but here are my thoughts:

Yes, swinging WAS about wife-swapping (car keys in a bowl, and all that): if you didn't have a car, you weren't getting in. And having a wife to bring along helped.
But over time, as people found preferred playmates and stuck to them, they'd find couples split up, but still chose to play with them (separately or otherwise).
Then you had couples that preferred singles: some single females (for MFF or FMF depedning who was getting the treat) and some preferred single males (usually MFM, but MMF also happens depending on persuasion).

Now, the definition had always been about the act and what transpired on the meet. So it was safe to say the people that partook in said event were "swingers", ergo the singles on these threesomes also counted as swingers.

So if 2 single "swingers" (swingles) that had experience of being invited to threesomes (and M and an F) decided to meet each other and their version on enactment, with no emotional ties or promises/expectation of a relationship to come out of it, why cant that be swinging?

Or better yet: 2 couples choose to meet and they have a lovely 4 some - yes that's swinging.
Then (wuth everyone's agreement) couple A met female B, and still counted that as swinging.
Or, couple B met guy A.. and still counted that as swinging.
Lets say both females are bi, and decided to meet on their own (who knows, guys ere working late): is that still swinging?
What if both guys are also bi, and they work nights but had the day to themselves and decided to meet while the girls were out (with everyone;s knowledge and consent of course), is that still swinging?

Put it this way, there's a "couple" I've known for some 5 years now on another site:
They met as singles.
Live different parts of the country (him London, her Birmingham)
They attend socials together (depending who travels where)
But, only play with each other AND have no plans to seek or play with anyone else, including other couples.
And they've maintained this "voluntary exclusive monogamous" status for the 5 or so years.
But they count themselves as swingers.

So my question: is it more the act, or who partakes it?

Just cause I walk onto a golf course, wearing the appropriate attire, carrying all the kit, knowing the etiquette and can reel off the stats. doesn't make me a golfer is I've never actually hit a ball.

Just my tuppence xxx
 
MP386

MOTM

9 November 2015
28,445
66,453
58
Whether you call it negative or not it’s about getting your Ying and Yangs (could be a euphemism) together which isn’t always easy and does take planning....I’ve talked to people that say they don’t have much interest or offers but when you suggest meeting their diaries are full ...
probably said it more than once now but logistics plays a big part as no one lives close ,yes it would be nice to drive all over the place having sex but the reality is life does get in the way sometimes and finance for many are tight ... it’s ok to moan about people not meeting or being arm chair enthusiasts but there is a bigger picture ....
I have to say meeting singles if I’m honest find it more intimate and you can spend more time together... which makes the experience all the better ....
it’s more complicated than just messaging “lets fuck” or am I doing it all wrong :confused:
 
14 February 2017
859
3,224
City
London
Whether you call it negative or not it’s about getting your Ying and Yangs (could be a euphemism) together which isn’t always easy and does take planning....I’ve talked to people that say they don’t have much interest or offers but when you suggest meeting their diaries are full ...
probably said it more than once now but logistics plays a big part as no one lives close ,yes it would be nice to drive all over the place having sex but the reality is life does get in the way sometimes and finance for many are tight ... it’s ok to moan about people not meeting or being arm chair enthusiasts but there is a bigger picture ....
I have to say meeting singles if I’m honest find it more intimate and you can spend more time together... which makes the experience all the better ....
it’s more complicated than just messaging “lets fuck” or am I doing it all wrong :confused:

I've also talked to people (again, experience over the years, not necessarily saying on SS) that say they seem to no receive much interest so are left with "plenty of time and no one to do", yet make the offer and suggestion that work for all, and i get crickets or some excuse why they can't. Eventually I just leave things be till they are ready, then observe their statuses of "How come no one is interested in us?" they post every 2 days (thinking of one couple in particular I've known for some 10 years).
 
MP386

MOTM

9 November 2015
28,445
66,453
58
I've also talked to people (again, experience over the years, not necessarily saying on SS) that say they seem to no receive much interest so are left with "plenty of time and no one to do", yet make the offer and suggestion that work for all, and i get crickets or some excuse why they can't. Eventually I just leave things be till they are ready, then observe their statuses of "How come no one is interested in us?" they post every 2 days (thinking of one couple in particular I've known for some 10 years).
Blimey if it happens to you I don’t stand much chance ... I agree with what you say I get to the point and say “just let me know when you can “ goes eerily quite then ....
 
14 February 2017
859
3,224
City
London
Blimey if it happens to you I don’t stand much chance ... I agree with what you say I get to the point and say “just let me know when you can “ goes eerily quite then ....

Lol, please don't look at me as some beacon. There are some women and couples over the years that even I've either felt I was punching above my weight, or been knocked back/ignored by altogether... then I see they guy they play with and just mutter to myself "You do know he turned up in jogging bottoms, a t-shirt with last night's kebab spill on it, and hasn't had a wash yet?" and ultimately move on. If that's waht floats their boat then to quote dragon's den "I'm out!" :)
 

Therapon

Admin
11 August 2015
24,400
47,314
Blimey if it happens to you I don’t stand much chance ... I agree with what you say I get to the point and say “just let me know when you can “ goes eerily quite then ....

I'm sure you have met a few in your time on here. As you say above, yes it takes effort, yes you need to travel no matter which site you are on and yes it costs money and yes some knock you back because they broke their fingernail ..... such is life.
The question is though, do you see yourself as a swinger?
 
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14 February 2017
859
3,224
City
London
I'm sure you have met a few in your time on here. As you say above, yes it takes effort, yes you need to travel not matter which site you are on and yes it costs money and yes some knock you back because the broke their fingernail ..... such is life.
The question is though, do you see yourself as a swinger?

Oh I am definitely a swinger, irrespective what site I'm on (Even dabbled on AFF when starting out, and also currently exploring my Kink side on Fet). But yes, my years have had some fantastic experiences, just looking to expand on that.
 
MP386

MOTM

9 November 2015
28,445
66,453
58
I'm sure you have met a few in your time on here. As you say above, yes it takes effort, yes you need to travel not matter which site you are on and yes it costs money and yes some knock you back because the broke their fingernail ..... such is life.
The question is though, do you see yourself as a swinger?
The only people I meet are from here I don’t use any other sites ...
I have never denied any of the points made .... it takes work yes and is more than frustrating so I can see both sides of the coin ....
as for being a swinger well I hope I am considered that ... before joining here I used a few dating sites because at that time I thought that’s what I wanted .... knock backs a plenty only ever met one person who was only after a meal out.. my life has been one constant knock back so it’s usual part of life for me ... so that’s when I found SS by chance really and I wouldn’t still be here if it’s not been worth it ... I use the site yes because I still want to have sex even at my age ... swinging allows that ...one day I will hopefully meet someone who may become a regular swinging partner to have fun with having said that not looking for partner or wife but as we know it has happened here... so after that anyone fancy shag ??
:rofl::rofl::rofl:
 
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14 February 2017
859
3,224
City
London
Aye aye, I agree: Ladies,.. #FancyAShag? (inbox open), lol. Don't say no one asked you :)
 
5 July 2016
5,740
9,823
City
Ossett
I was in a swinging relationship but it ended and I want to continue my lifestyle. I joined so that I can meet likeminded people who aren’t horrified by my choices and judge me. Technically I am single but hope I can be classed as a swinger, as want to indulge in everything I did before. I can be open and honest on here with everyone and enjoy my choices with the hope that one day I might possibly find a new partner who is not going to run a mile because he knows how I want to live my life now. That hopefully will equal a very happy and secure swinging relationship xx

I absolutely agree and I understand the staff don't want to turn this into a dating site but there isn't anything wrong with too single swingers that click and form a relationship (in my opinion anyway) and I know of at least 2 couples on this site who have done just that and still continue to swing. Hell it's a lot easier than finding a vanilla and then telling them that you're a swinger. They'd probably run a mile :rofl:

It's hard enough to get someone to want to have sex with me anyway without telling them I'd quite like to have sex with their friends too :rofl:

X
 
MP386

MOTM

9 November 2015
28,445
66,453
58
I absolutely agree and I understand the staff don't want to turn this into a dating site but there isn't anything wrong with too single swingers that click and form a relationship (in my opinion anyway) and I know of at least 2 couples on this site who have done just that and still continue to swing. Hell it's a lot easier than finding a vanilla and then telling them that you're a swinger. They'd probably run a mile :rofl:

It's hard enough to get someone to want to have sex with me anyway without telling them I'd quite like to have sex with their friends too :rofl:

X
We have a new hashtag for single blokes it #fancyashag (y)